19.Mar.18, 03:19 AM
Indivara laughed, more at V’ler talking through a mouthful of food than what he was saying. “Maybe bronze,” she teased, looking at V’ler slyly from the corner of her eyes. She wasn’t ashamed or embarrassed about her dream to Impress to a bronze dragon, she still believed she was worthy of a bronze hide, it was just that Venseth had Hatched first and claimed her – and she didn’t regret that at all! The idea of riding bronze and being a Weyrleader was still appealing, though, and she thought she would have done well. As it was, her new goal of Weyrlingmaster was keeping her on her toes and learning a lot more than she thought was possible. Of course, now she was learning all about five colours, instead of focusing on those relating to blue.
“Probably,” Indivara said softly, picking at her fingernails as she chewed on her thoughts. She glanced sideways at V’ler, and then back down at her hands. She sighed softly, her shoulders slumping. “About that…” she said, lowly, “um,” her fingers started attacking the hem of her shirt. “I don’t want you to think, you know, that you have to, because you don’t. And I’m sorry,” she cringed, glancing up at V’ler with a hot flush and a guilty look. “Ven… I don’t, um, think he was trying very hard?” She paused, frowning, and Venseth butted in happily –I wasn’t! Indivara’s frowned deepened and shrugged slightly, still attacking the hem of her shirt.
“Well, when Coroth was, um, won, Ven sort of… I don’t know? Let me go? I was me before everyone paired off; I didn’t even feel any, you know…” She shifted uncomfortably. “I was, um, just going to go home, but um… You were um, right there, and um, I, um. I really wanted… So um, I … kissed you?” She cringed, shoulders creeping up as she curled into herself and away from V’ler, wondering exactly how upset he was going to be with her, but unable to keep the secret when she felt so guilty about it. She didn’t know why, she’d been Flight Mothing for years before Impressing, but she’d always been the one getting grabbed. She had never actually actively forced herself..? On someone. Even last time she had been with V’ler, he’d grabbed her, not the other way around. For some reason she couldn’t explain, that made all the difference to Indivara.
She wanted to say more, but she wasn’t sure what, so she settled on not saying anything and just waited for V’ler to kick her out… She had no idea where she’d go, and that was all kinds of terrifying in itself.
“Probably,” Indivara said softly, picking at her fingernails as she chewed on her thoughts. She glanced sideways at V’ler, and then back down at her hands. She sighed softly, her shoulders slumping. “About that…” she said, lowly, “um,” her fingers started attacking the hem of her shirt. “I don’t want you to think, you know, that you have to, because you don’t. And I’m sorry,” she cringed, glancing up at V’ler with a hot flush and a guilty look. “Ven… I don’t, um, think he was trying very hard?” She paused, frowning, and Venseth butted in happily –
“Well, when Coroth was, um, won, Ven sort of… I don’t know? Let me go? I was me before everyone paired off; I didn’t even feel any, you know…” She shifted uncomfortably. “I was, um, just going to go home, but um… You were um, right there, and um, I, um. I really wanted… So um, I … kissed you?” She cringed, shoulders creeping up as she curled into herself and away from V’ler, wondering exactly how upset he was going to be with her, but unable to keep the secret when she felt so guilty about it. She didn’t know why, she’d been Flight Mothing for years before Impressing, but she’d always been the one getting grabbed. She had never actually actively forced herself..? On someone. Even last time she had been with V’ler, he’d grabbed her, not the other way around. For some reason she couldn’t explain, that made all the difference to Indivara.
She wanted to say more, but she wasn’t sure what, so she settled on not saying anything and just waited for V’ler to kick her out… She had no idea where she’d go, and that was all kinds of terrifying in itself.