Nightmare Fuel [Indivara]

Casa woke up with a scream, chest rising and falling rapidly as she tried to breathe. Almost immediately, she gagged, pulling herself out of her bed as the imagined smell of the rotting queen filled her nose. Her sound of panic roused the firelizards, who creeled and crooned, making for a loud and chaotic environment as Casa tried to get her bearings. After a moment, she sat down on her bed again, grinding her palms against her eyes in a dual effort to cause the pain lancing through her head and the images of the dead dragonet to fade into nothingness.

After a couple of minutes, the perceived smell was gone and only flash frames of the hatching still flickered through her mind. The firelizards had come to settle around her in a concerned and nervous group, each trying to crawl up and lie against her. She sighed, shaking her head softly. "You all rest here...I need to think." They chirped and snuggled back into the blankets reluctantly, obviously upset they could not console her. She pulled back the lid of a glowbasket in the room, searching around for clean clothing to take with her. It was harder to find then she expected; she had been so distracted that the only things she'd really focused on were feeding the beasts and doing her chores. Her own personal care had kind of fallen behind. Just another worry.

Sighing, she grabbed one of the things Arddra had given her - the tunic and the flowy skirt. It wouldn't help now, with the rain, but it would have to do. All of her new clothing was dirty. Muttering, she shoved it into a bag and threw on a cloak that was too big for her that had ended up in her things. She set out into the pouring rain, which was currently dumping buckets from the dark sky. She clumped through the mud and the puddles, shivering in her cloak until she reached the Bathing Houses.

Ducking inside, she opened the door to the first bathing room she found. It was empty, and she stripped out of her muddy, messy clothing, shoving the mess into the corner for now. She'd rinse it all out before she left. She sunk into the steaming water in the tub, curling herself into a ball and letting her eyes close for a moment as the heat began to unkink muscles that rarely let go when she slept. Pawing at the bags under her eyes, she let herself have a serene moment for a little while.

She had managed to wake quietly, the strangled scream breaking off into a broken mew before it fully left her lips, and somehow she had avoided kicking V’ler as she flailed into a sitting position, soaked in a cold sweat. Her hair was stuck to the side of her face, her shirt to her back, and Indivara trembled as the cold air bit her feverish body. On her pillow (or the pillow she had stolen, at any rate) Queenie crooned softly before she was scolded by Sucker. Indivara ignored them as she smoothed her breathing down. Either she had not woken the bluerider this time, or he was pretending to be asleep. Indivara was not in the mood to find out which.

Slipping carefully out of the bed, being somewhat careful not to poke, prod or jostle V’ler too much, Indivara set her feet on the cold floor, and shuddered. The heavy sound of the midnight rain should have been reassuring, soothing, but all it was doing was making the girl feel anxious and fidgety. It was not an unusual feeling, and Indivara knew enough to be aware that it was likely the fever, that she had gone and managed to get sick again, and why was her life so miserable? Her lip trembled as the scenes from her nightmare played before her wide open eyes, and Indivara’s hand clapped over her mouth even as she yelped into it, the sound muffled.

She had to get out.

Indivara’s concern was not for disturbing V’ler and his desire to get a proper sleep; she had woken him up enough times over the past few days – weeks? Months? Or had it been years? It felt like an eternity! – With little concern for his bad attitude, but Indivara was sick of the questions, and the looks. She was sick of accusations, of pity, and whatever else it was that people kept looking at her with! It made her angry, and anger was something Indivara could deal with. She knew how to channel anger; she knew how to express it without tears, and that made her feel stronger, and in control. Control was important, and Indivara added a spiteful jab to her desire for control as she tugged on one of V’ler’s fancy tops and slipped out the hut door. She did not so much as glance in Veeth’s direction, simply ducked her head and ran barefoot across the Weyr as fast as she could.

She knew where she was going, long before she got there, and her feet took her along the familiar path without hesitation. Despite that, she was lucky to make it to the bathing house without breaking her neck, and Indivara was aware of that as she pushed the door open, trekking mud inside without a thought for the poor bastard that would be required to clean it up. So long as it was not her, she did not care in the slightest. Water dripped from her long hair, a trail of lesser rain down the hall as Indivara angled for one of her favourite rooms, and pushed the door open without thought; who else would be up at such an hour on such a miserable night?

Apparently, weyrbrats were. Indivara’s expression scrunched up into a disgusted sneer as she watched Casa for a few moments, snorted, and proceeded to back out of the room without so much as a word.

Casa found the water and silence of the bathing house very pleasant, until another noise caught her attention. Slowly peeking her eyes open, she saw someone stalk into the room, catch sight of her, sneer, and turn to leave. Casa didn't need more than a half glance to recognize Indivara; the scars across her face made her one of the easiest to find people in the whole Weyr. She seemed clearly disgusted by the idea of sharing the room with Casa, but she figured she'd at least try. The worst she did was say something rude and storm off, like she did for pretty much all things.

She thought about the many things she could say, and tried to find the best approach. Indivara was tempermental on the best of days, and while Casa didn't know her well, the woman had a reputation when it came to Hatchings. The first had involved her being mauled by a bronze or something; Casa didn't know or remember too much about it, besides the obvious marks.

The other one seemed to be affecting Indivara as much as herself, seeing as she was here in the middle of the night, looking irritated and tired. She frowned. Being bubbly wasn't going to work with her, nor was trying to reach out to her as friend. At least, that's what she'd heard. She was too tired to try and put that much effort into it anyhow. Right now, she had enough energy to at least try a meager, quiet approach. If it didn't work, she wasn't going to let it stress her. She was stressed enough as it was.

Taking a little breath, she tilted her head up to glance at Indivara calmly.

"You are welcome in here too. I'm not going to talk your ear off or irritate you with anything beyond my presence." Her voice was the opposite of the cheerful, bubbly energy she gave off; it was quiet, almost guarded, but polite. She kept her curious gaze on Indivara long enough to see if she was going to turn around or not, before dropping her eyes back towards the water. She dipped her head back, letting the hot water run over her neck and shoulders, and returned to quiet contemplation that the silence of the room brought. 

“The fuck are you doing up this late?” Indivara’s question was less than pleasant as she paused in the doorway, shivering in the wet clothes she was wearing, and glared down at the brat hogging her favourite bath. She wouldn’t admit to anyone – and especially not herself – why it was her favourite room in the bathing house, but it was, and Indivara was not at all pleased by finding some blonde princess dirtying the water with her obnoxiousness. The girl’s expression twisted into a sneer and she wavered for a moment. Take out her frustrations on the blonde bimbo, or go find another bath, and then go take her frustrations out on a too-asleep-to-fight-back V’ler?

All of the above?

Apparently deciding on at least A, but likely a combination of A and B, Indivara stepped into the room and flicked the door shut. She didn’t bother to lock it, not interested in the girl in the bathwater having a freak out thinking Indivara was going to attack her or something ridiculous (Indivara did not have that kind of energy at the moment; besides, drowning someone in her favourite tub was not something she liked the idea of). Grumpy blue eyes examined the room before Indivara made her way over to the bench on the far side and poked around at what was there; some towels, soaps, oils, the usual crap that was left in the bathing house for the Weyr occupants to use.

Deciding there were enough towels there, and that she wouldn’t have to go running around to find more (or rather, actively get to them before Casa and make the brat run around naked) Indivara made her way to the far end of the tub and eyed Casa off suspiciously. If she had pissed in the water, Indivara was going to skin her alive! With that thought clearly written on her face, Indivara sat down on the edge of the tub and slipped her bare legs into the water. The warmth was closer to hot on her rain-damped skin, but her fever was fighting back.

Indivara took a deep breath, and slipped into the water – shirt still very much on – and then ducked down so her chin was barely above it. The small girl’s body was wracked with shivers, but sweat quickly beaded across her forehead. The list of people that would kill her for running around in the rain with a fever was longer than Indivara had thought as she idled on who it was that would be angry with her – Ry would be, and Par’a, and Talian would probably give her dirty looks when she wound up under his reluctant care again. Her mother would sneer, and Val would probably make a snippy remark. She hadn’t known so many people cared! Indivara’s eyes were glassy with the feverish thoughts as she turned her attention back on Casa.

“You’re in my bath,” she told the girl, her voice slightly lost, and tinged with confusion.