Hello loves! While I haven't been writing, I have been working on updating some issues that have been hanging around on the layout! The Character change box is now at the bottom of the page, beside the up/down arrows! Green and Gold dragon flight dates have been shifted to the bottom of the page, where the (useless!) discord widget was located. Where the dragon flights were in the header, is now replaced by a Monthly Event box! This will be updated at the start of each month, with a fun mini-event you can take part in, if you want to! Thistle!
14.May.13, 02:06 PM
Perhaps it was true that the Weyrbred were raised in such a way that there could be no understanding between them and the Stolen. Isscer didn't doubt that; the Southerners praised dragons in a way that was not done in the North--dragons were a myth there, having faded away--and the values truly were different. Despite recognizing this, Isscer didn't see how differing values made the ill treatment of the Stolen by the weyrbrats permissible--he would never understand that.
But perhaps their jealousy over the Northerners Impressing was valid; Talian was one example of an unwilling Candidate being chosen over the scores of weyrbrats. Isscer had to look away from Talian as he spoke about the feeling he had felt before Standing the last time; he turned his attention back to his task of gathering the sick into the bowl, afraid to let Talian see the naked distress writ plain across his features. He very carefully said nothing, but it wouldn't have mattered--Isscer couldn't speak, couldn't express how terrified he was of Impression, of that change that would change everything forever. He got to his feet, setting the bowl aside before scrubbing his hands clean in a nearby bowl of water.
The mention of Khaduceth made Isscer whip around so quickly that he nearly dropped the towel he was using to dry his hands. They shook so badly with fear that he had to cross his arms, tucking them close to his body so Talian couldn't see how badly he was affected. As it was, Isscer was stunned. No one had ever offered to introduce him to a dragon; no one had ever put it so nicely, or had cared to do so. "I--I," Isscer fumbled, falling quiet as he simply stared at Talian.
I want you to see that he's not changed me.
The words rattled around in the Farmcrafter's head; he couldn't find the words to say, grasping at so many straws and none of them suitable. No one had ever made the gesture, no one had ever bothered to try to show him that not all dragons were terrible. "I don't know what to say," Isscer managed after a long silence, mouth quirking into a fake smile for a brief moment before it fell away. "No one's ever asked me that before." He was torn; Talian was a kindred spirit, someone who understood, but Isscer had been so quick to shove him in with the other dragonriders after his Impression to Khaduceth that he felt guilty.
"I'm sorry for, you know, being distant." They had not been such close friends before, not to the level of Valerian and Erisi, but there had been a level of understanding there. Isscer had done what he did best when Talian had Impressed: avoided him like he had the Plague, and had written Talian off as one of them. That Talian now was trying to offer him something to restore peace when it wasn't his fault... Isscer was so ashamed. "I just--" Isscer took a deep breath, expelling it in a rush, trying to calm down. "It's so much easier when there is a you and a them. Easier to deal with everything: the Hatchings, the expectations, the fear that you'll become one of them."
The Farmcrafter was shaking from head to foot now, knees knocking together, but now that he had begun speaking it had to be finished. "I'm not trying to justify it because I know I've done you wrong, but you need to understand. Six years of being in this place, and every Hatching I fear that it will be the one. What dragon would possibly want me? I don't even know if I could love it." Isscer caught Talian's eye, intent on making one thing clear. "I never meant to hurt you. I just was trying to protect myself, and that's gotten me nowhere. We could have been such good friends, and I've single-handedly ruined it." Isscer shook his head, despairing, angry at himself. "And now you want me to meet Khaduceth like nothing has ever happened, and I feel terrible because I've alienated you. You should resent me because of it, not be offering to introduce me to your dragon."
But perhaps their jealousy over the Northerners Impressing was valid; Talian was one example of an unwilling Candidate being chosen over the scores of weyrbrats. Isscer had to look away from Talian as he spoke about the feeling he had felt before Standing the last time; he turned his attention back to his task of gathering the sick into the bowl, afraid to let Talian see the naked distress writ plain across his features. He very carefully said nothing, but it wouldn't have mattered--Isscer couldn't speak, couldn't express how terrified he was of Impression, of that change that would change everything forever. He got to his feet, setting the bowl aside before scrubbing his hands clean in a nearby bowl of water.
The mention of Khaduceth made Isscer whip around so quickly that he nearly dropped the towel he was using to dry his hands. They shook so badly with fear that he had to cross his arms, tucking them close to his body so Talian couldn't see how badly he was affected. As it was, Isscer was stunned. No one had ever offered to introduce him to a dragon; no one had ever put it so nicely, or had cared to do so. "I--I," Isscer fumbled, falling quiet as he simply stared at Talian.
I want you to see that he's not changed me.
The words rattled around in the Farmcrafter's head; he couldn't find the words to say, grasping at so many straws and none of them suitable. No one had ever made the gesture, no one had ever bothered to try to show him that not all dragons were terrible. "I don't know what to say," Isscer managed after a long silence, mouth quirking into a fake smile for a brief moment before it fell away. "No one's ever asked me that before." He was torn; Talian was a kindred spirit, someone who understood, but Isscer had been so quick to shove him in with the other dragonriders after his Impression to Khaduceth that he felt guilty.
"I'm sorry for, you know, being distant." They had not been such close friends before, not to the level of Valerian and Erisi, but there had been a level of understanding there. Isscer had done what he did best when Talian had Impressed: avoided him like he had the Plague, and had written Talian off as one of them. That Talian now was trying to offer him something to restore peace when it wasn't his fault... Isscer was so ashamed. "I just--" Isscer took a deep breath, expelling it in a rush, trying to calm down. "It's so much easier when there is a you and a them. Easier to deal with everything: the Hatchings, the expectations, the fear that you'll become one of them."
The Farmcrafter was shaking from head to foot now, knees knocking together, but now that he had begun speaking it had to be finished. "I'm not trying to justify it because I know I've done you wrong, but you need to understand. Six years of being in this place, and every Hatching I fear that it will be the one. What dragon would possibly want me? I don't even know if I could love it." Isscer caught Talian's eye, intent on making one thing clear. "I never meant to hurt you. I just was trying to protect myself, and that's gotten me nowhere. We could have been such good friends, and I've single-handedly ruined it." Isscer shook his head, despairing, angry at himself. "And now you want me to meet Khaduceth like nothing has ever happened, and I feel terrible because I've alienated you. You should resent me because of it, not be offering to introduce me to your dragon."
