Hello loves! While I haven't been writing, I have been working on updating some issues that have been hanging around on the layout! The Character change box is now at the bottom of the page, beside the up/down arrows! Green and Gold dragon flight dates have been shifted to the bottom of the page, where the (useless!) discord widget was located. Where the dragon flights were in the header, is now replaced by a Monthly Event box! This will be updated at the start of each month, with a fun mini-event you can take part in, if you want to! Thistle!
11.Aug.18, 03:18 AM
M’dox’s heart plummeted in his chest as T’bia refused to look at him. Had he done something wrong? He searched T’bia’s face hoping to find a clue, but only noticed the shine of unshed tears. A lump formed in his stomach at the idea that he’d made T’bia cry — again, a nasty voice in his whispered — and M’dox swallowed, fending off tears of his own. He wouldn’t cry, not today, it wouldn’t help. It would just make T’bia sad, which was the opposite of what he wanted. Riquarth crooned softly at him, sending quiet reassurance but allowing M’dox to figure things out on his own. Still, the brown was perfectly happy to help keep M’dox’s anxiety from spiking too high and causing him to shut down, only able to think about everything he’d done wrong and how everyone hated him. No, M’dox never needed to reach that point again, not while Riquarth was around to prevent it.
With Riquarth’s calm bolstering him M’dox managed not to cry or hyperventilate, and waited for T’bia to say something, keeping his hand resting on T’bia’s face, steady but gentle. He watched as T’bia slowly lifted his head to look at him; he wasn't making direct eye contact, but M’dox felt it was more encouraging than avoiding looking at him entirely.
It was only another second or so before T’bia spoke, and his first words had M’dox's breath catching. T’bia had said he’d liked kissing M’dox, both a minute ago and on their picnic, but that was different from T’bia saying he liked him. Which was amazing! T’bia liked him, he’d said it! It would be even better if he hadn’t said it while nearly crying.
The next few phrases were harder for M’dox to figure out, all of them said quite quickly and he got a bit distracted by T’bia touching his face. Riquarth helpfully repeated everything again, a little more slowly, trying to assist without interfering too much. It took a few run throughs of everything for M’dox to manage to mostly pick it apart into fragments he understood. M’dox’s brow furrowed as he tried to piece what T’bia meant together. So, T’bia couldn’t (whatever he meant exactly by ‘can’t’) have sex with him (just right then, or in general?), though he wanted to (M’dox breathed a sigh of relief at that) because he’d never had sex before (which really, M’dox should have realized much earlier, probably when Jycenth said T’bia had never kissed anyone before, as T’bia didn’t really seem the type to have had sex and not have kissed anyone in the process) and he thought M’dox would be mad at him because of it. Probably? That was M’dox’s best interpretation, in any case. Which was rather a lot, actually. Best to start with the important bit.
“I’m not mad at you,” M’dox said softly, brushing his thumb against the corner of T’bia’s eye in an attempt to wipe away any tears collecting there. “I’m not. And I’m not going to ask you to do anything you aren’t comfortable with. When I know you aren’t comfortable with it, I mean, I might ask something if I don’t know, but if you tell me you don’t want to do something, we won’t do it, okay? Even if I want to, and I don’t…” he trailed off a moment, trying to find the words that would properly express what he meant instead of rambling. M’dox took a deep breath, closing his eyes for a moment before slowly starting to speak again.
“I like you a lot, T’bia,” he started again, “and I don’t want to upset you, or hurt you, or anything like that. We don’t have to, uh, have sex yet, not if you don’t feel you’re ready, and I don’t think I am either. I mean, I’d like to, eventually, with you, but it doesn’t have to be today, or next week, or next month, even.” M’dox blushed heavily at that, surprised at how open he was being. Something about T’bia just made M’dox want to make sure he was always happy, and smiling in that way that made him feel like he was made of air. It was a little embarrassing, but it was true! And right then, it seemed to M’dox that T’bia could do with hearing some of it.
“I like spending time with you, talking to you, hearing about your family, or whatever Jycenth said over breakfast. I like kissing you, I like being able to hold you like this. I’m sure I’d like having sex with you too, but that’s not nearly as important as just being with you, T’bia.” M’dox took a deep breath, throat dry and a flush creeping back over his face as he leaned in to press his forehead to T’bia’s. He didn’t know what else to say, and he had already said quite a lot, and M’dox really, really hoped at least some of the words were the right ones. Or at least, not the complete wrong ones.
With Riquarth’s calm bolstering him M’dox managed not to cry or hyperventilate, and waited for T’bia to say something, keeping his hand resting on T’bia’s face, steady but gentle. He watched as T’bia slowly lifted his head to look at him; he wasn't making direct eye contact, but M’dox felt it was more encouraging than avoiding looking at him entirely.
It was only another second or so before T’bia spoke, and his first words had M’dox's breath catching. T’bia had said he’d liked kissing M’dox, both a minute ago and on their picnic, but that was different from T’bia saying he liked him. Which was amazing! T’bia liked him, he’d said it! It would be even better if he hadn’t said it while nearly crying.
The next few phrases were harder for M’dox to figure out, all of them said quite quickly and he got a bit distracted by T’bia touching his face. Riquarth helpfully repeated everything again, a little more slowly, trying to assist without interfering too much. It took a few run throughs of everything for M’dox to manage to mostly pick it apart into fragments he understood. M’dox’s brow furrowed as he tried to piece what T’bia meant together. So, T’bia couldn’t (whatever he meant exactly by ‘can’t’) have sex with him (just right then, or in general?), though he wanted to (M’dox breathed a sigh of relief at that) because he’d never had sex before (which really, M’dox should have realized much earlier, probably when Jycenth said T’bia had never kissed anyone before, as T’bia didn’t really seem the type to have had sex and not have kissed anyone in the process) and he thought M’dox would be mad at him because of it. Probably? That was M’dox’s best interpretation, in any case. Which was rather a lot, actually. Best to start with the important bit.
“I’m not mad at you,” M’dox said softly, brushing his thumb against the corner of T’bia’s eye in an attempt to wipe away any tears collecting there. “I’m not. And I’m not going to ask you to do anything you aren’t comfortable with. When I know you aren’t comfortable with it, I mean, I might ask something if I don’t know, but if you tell me you don’t want to do something, we won’t do it, okay? Even if I want to, and I don’t…” he trailed off a moment, trying to find the words that would properly express what he meant instead of rambling. M’dox took a deep breath, closing his eyes for a moment before slowly starting to speak again.
“I like you a lot, T’bia,” he started again, “and I don’t want to upset you, or hurt you, or anything like that. We don’t have to, uh, have sex yet, not if you don’t feel you’re ready, and I don’t think I am either. I mean, I’d like to, eventually, with you, but it doesn’t have to be today, or next week, or next month, even.” M’dox blushed heavily at that, surprised at how open he was being. Something about T’bia just made M’dox want to make sure he was always happy, and smiling in that way that made him feel like he was made of air. It was a little embarrassing, but it was true! And right then, it seemed to M’dox that T’bia could do with hearing some of it.
“I like spending time with you, talking to you, hearing about your family, or whatever Jycenth said over breakfast. I like kissing you, I like being able to hold you like this. I’m sure I’d like having sex with you too, but that’s not nearly as important as just being with you, T’bia.” M’dox took a deep breath, throat dry and a flush creeping back over his face as he leaned in to press his forehead to T’bia’s. He didn’t know what else to say, and he had already said quite a lot, and M’dox really, really hoped at least some of the words were the right ones. Or at least, not the complete wrong ones.
