Hello loves! While I haven't been writing, I have been working on updating some issues that have been hanging around on the layout! The Character change box is now at the bottom of the page, beside the up/down arrows! Green and Gold dragon flight dates have been shifted to the bottom of the page, where the (useless!) discord widget was located. Where the dragon flights were in the header, is now replaced by a Monthly Event box! This will be updated at the start of each month, with a fun mini-event you can take part in, if you want to! Thistle!
10.Jan.13, 02:54 AM
B’jin was going to hate him. R’nd knew that without a doubt and while he also knew he wasn’t good enough for the greenrider, the fear of watching B’jin run out the door and never look back terrified his tongue into remaining still. They had been apart for six days and seven hours before over a firelizard and that had been torture. Could he really exist without B’jin in his life again? The man was fun, funny, and soothing. They had things in common yet so much they didn’t as well but they made it work and everything blended together nicely. R’nd was going to ruin it all with his confessions but he also knew he had ruined it all by simply doing what he had to begin with. As much as his guilt was punishing him, R’nd knew he needed proper punishment that would only come in the form of B’jin yelling at him and storming out of his life.
“You’re,” going to hate me, R’nd finished the sentence in his mind, too afraid to give the greenrider any ideas on how to react to the news. Maybe there was a chance it would all work out! R’nd had to hold onto that belief though he couldn’t quite explain to himself why it was so important to keep this friend beyond his usual need to have everyone happy and smiling at him. As R’nd took a long drink from his glass that ended up downing half the contents, he realised he was stalling again and it was about time he just spilled already. Waiting was only making it hurt more and would make everything worse. “Do you remember how shocked and upset I was that Shel had been lashed for the kitchen fire? I… I was the other person with him that he was protecting by not naming me.” R’nd’s voice lowered with the confession as he stared down at the floor; too ashamed to look B’jin in the eye.
“We weren’t looking for snacks either. We… he invited me to meet him there to talk about how he was going to try harder with N’gelt but we ended up having sex on the table and when someone tried to come in, we fled but I’shan knocked over the candle.” His fear was kicking in and R’nd started speaking faster, babbling the details as he went. A frantic gaze finally lifted to B’jin as R’nd continued his confessions, knowing if he stopped then he wouldn’t finish and while B’jin had probably heard enough, he needed to know everything before damning the bluerider forever.
“That wasn’t the first time I’ve slept with Shel. In the last few months we’ve met up in secret behind N’gelt’s back and behind yours. I’ve wanted to sleep with him since I started to spend time with him in my weyrling days but he was never interested so when he confessed to having it now, I was weak and took it. I’m so sorry, B’jin. I didn’t mean to cheat on you, not even once but I went and did so multiple times with Shel. I’m sorry I’ve slept with someone else, B’jin, I really am. I don’t deserve your pity or forgiveness though. I understand.” And he did understand. When he was with someone regardless of the short time, R’nd dedicated himself to that person. He had the casual lovers that were rotated through but when he was in the mood to pamper and focus on one person, that’s exactly what he did. He didn’t look at anyone else outside of flight lust, yet there he was confessing to sleeping with his best friend behind B’jin’s back. The entire weyr thought they were mated as well which only made his crime all the more heinous.
How strange; his hands were shaking. R’nd stared at them in disbelief for a moment before slowly setting the glass down as he didn’t fancy the idea of wearing the wine. He didn’t know what else to say, having confessed to his crimes but finding it hard to defend himself further than he had. All he had left to do was wait for the hatred to flow and to lose B’jin.
“You’re,” going to hate me, R’nd finished the sentence in his mind, too afraid to give the greenrider any ideas on how to react to the news. Maybe there was a chance it would all work out! R’nd had to hold onto that belief though he couldn’t quite explain to himself why it was so important to keep this friend beyond his usual need to have everyone happy and smiling at him. As R’nd took a long drink from his glass that ended up downing half the contents, he realised he was stalling again and it was about time he just spilled already. Waiting was only making it hurt more and would make everything worse. “Do you remember how shocked and upset I was that Shel had been lashed for the kitchen fire? I… I was the other person with him that he was protecting by not naming me.” R’nd’s voice lowered with the confession as he stared down at the floor; too ashamed to look B’jin in the eye.
“We weren’t looking for snacks either. We… he invited me to meet him there to talk about how he was going to try harder with N’gelt but we ended up having sex on the table and when someone tried to come in, we fled but I’shan knocked over the candle.” His fear was kicking in and R’nd started speaking faster, babbling the details as he went. A frantic gaze finally lifted to B’jin as R’nd continued his confessions, knowing if he stopped then he wouldn’t finish and while B’jin had probably heard enough, he needed to know everything before damning the bluerider forever.
“That wasn’t the first time I’ve slept with Shel. In the last few months we’ve met up in secret behind N’gelt’s back and behind yours. I’ve wanted to sleep with him since I started to spend time with him in my weyrling days but he was never interested so when he confessed to having it now, I was weak and took it. I’m so sorry, B’jin. I didn’t mean to cheat on you, not even once but I went and did so multiple times with Shel. I’m sorry I’ve slept with someone else, B’jin, I really am. I don’t deserve your pity or forgiveness though. I understand.” And he did understand. When he was with someone regardless of the short time, R’nd dedicated himself to that person. He had the casual lovers that were rotated through but when he was in the mood to pamper and focus on one person, that’s exactly what he did. He didn’t look at anyone else outside of flight lust, yet there he was confessing to sleeping with his best friend behind B’jin’s back. The entire weyr thought they were mated as well which only made his crime all the more heinous.
How strange; his hands were shaking. R’nd stared at them in disbelief for a moment before slowly setting the glass down as he didn’t fancy the idea of wearing the wine. He didn’t know what else to say, having confessed to his crimes but finding it hard to defend himself further than he had. All he had left to do was wait for the hatred to flow and to lose B’jin.
