Return of the Master [Talian]

With his elbow resting upon the desk and his forehead resting in his hands his hazel eyes were closed. He was not sleeping. In his left hand was a half cup of semi-hot klah wafting it's subtle scent into his nose as he breathed calmly. His mind was anything but calm though. In front of him was a thick half-written book full of detailed plant and flower sketches, notes, observations and detailed instructions on uses, properties, medicinal value, theories and experiments both successes and failures.

It was his own book and he was currently fighting his mind to figure out one particular property of the tiny pink flower he had picked the night before. He had gotten very little sleep. Most of his night had been spent hovering over his work bench testing the various pieces of the flower for medicinal qualities. Most were negative but one test of the bloom itself was inconclusive and it irritated him as he tried to figure out its mystery.

He had just finished recording his findings and sketched the different parts of this little flower in his book with the detailed notes of his findings. His head ached, his back ached and his mind raced. He needed to get some sleep but already the sun was just barely lifting above the horizon. It was going to be another very long day. Pinching the bridge of his nose, he sighed quietly and opened his eyes for another slow sip of his klah.

He frowned into his klah when the heat of it, or lack thereof, touched his lips. He liked his klah hot. Closing his medical journal, he stood up and set it back into his place in the desk drawer on the right hand side. The writing utensil was also put into its place. Another few gulps of his klah saw it finished. No reason to sip it with slow enjoyment if it was going cold.

Putting the klah cup down, his eyes turned towards the door of the small office he occupied.

You didn't sleep well again Khaduceth said as he rose to his feet.  The dragon waited with patient concern as Talian dressed himself and eventually emerged from the barracks, eyelids heavy and thin shoulders slumped. He hadn't answered Khaduceth's previous observation, but neither of them really needed him to. It was beyond obvious that he needed more and better sleep. Instead of speaking, Talian just reached out and placed his hand on Khaduceth's nose. They were quiet for a few long moments. 

Fellis was curled gently on his shoulder, purring slightly in greeting to the brown dragon. The polite fire lizard pushed his nose into Talian's hair, grooming him gently in an effort to cheer him up. Khauceth was of a similar mind, but clever enough to know that simple gestures like that wouldn't do much. He didn't bother asking what was wrong, for both of them already knew: it was the dreams.

"It's okay," Talian said lightly. He still hadn't fallen out of the habit of speaking aloud to his partner, even though they'd done a solid job of learning mental communication. It was soothing, and in all honesty talking in his head made Talian feel a little bit crazy. He supposed talking out loud to an animal was worse, but at least it felt natural. He smiled a little bit and pressed his forehead against the dragon's nose. "Thanks for worrying, but I'll be just fine."

Are you sure? the dragon asked, warily pushing his snout forward to nose the young man. Talian threw one arm around the alarmingly-large snout and pressed a kiss against the soft hide. "Promise," he confirmed. Then, a wary smile appeared. "Speaking of promises, well..."

Khaduceth knew what to do. The dragon lowered his neck and lifted his leg, allowing his boned to climb up. It had been a few days since the horrible first-ride lesson now, and with a bit of practice they'd gotten it down well enough. Talian's body wasn't exactly well-suited to climbing around and other physical activity, and exercising for lessons wasn't helping a bit. This, at least, was not so horrible as he first thought. Riding Khaduceth was actually pretty relaxing.

"I told B'jin I'd keep trying," he said aloud, as if reminding himself would help bolster his confidence. "So, let's go I guess."

Don't you want breakfast?

"Not yet. Come on; let's just go," he said. Khaduceth purred in approval, and Fellis let out the softest squeak of approval as they set out.

They wandered for a short while before Talian realized they'd drifted close to the infirmary. His guts twisted a bit at the sight of the building, even now in the low morning light. He didn't want to go over there. It was nothing but a big, ugly reminder of life's cruel jokes. He belonged inside that building a hundred times more than he belonged on Khaduceth's back!

Oddly enough, Khaduceth agreed. The dragon hadn't gotten out much. Talian never visited anyone except B'jin and Valerian, and the pair didn't go around the Weyr much except to get to and from lessons. Khaduceth had never been this building up close, but he'd seen it plenty of times in his bonded's dreams and memories. This was where Talian wanted to be, and that was good enough to Khaduceth. Can we go look? he asked respectfully, curious and wanting to know what the big deal was.

Talian bit his lip. "I guess it wouldn't hurt to check in," he muttered, reluctantly. If they'd rearranged his office, he would kill them all.

Pleased, Khaduceth projected warmth and reassurance to his bonded before he started to walk over. They approached the building from the east side and poked his snout at the first window he encountered. His breath fogged it up. Talian took a moment to try and peek through Khaduceth's eyes and see what was inside, but it only gave him a headache. "Khaduceth! Stop...Come on, let's just go around to the front."

My apologies. With that, Khaduceth backed away and started to turn towards the front of the building.

After spending a night lost in his research and note taking, Thellodar's eyes were blood shot and his mind was about to call it quits. Seeing the sun already up and coloring the sky made him shake his head and sigh. Running a hand over his face with his attention towards the door of the office, he was trying to get some semblance of a calm, ready mind again. He was so tired.

Taking the first step towards the door, a soft thud sounded behind him at the window. Turning around quickly he was startled to see a young brown dragon looking in and fogging the glass there. Though he was startled by it, he quickly found himself smiling. Could this be Talian's dragon? Could this dragon just be another one that just happened to be curious enough to look into Talian's office? There was only one way to find out.

Taking the half empty pot of klah, he poured more into his mug and filled up a second mug just in case. If it were Talian's dragon sneaking around the place, perhaps Talian would be with him. He knew that a love for klah is something the two of them had in common. Considering that it was early morning, klah was the best thing to have.

With the two mugs in his hand, he took a sip from his own, pleased that it was still hot, and headed out of the office, down the hall, around the corner and out the doors. Peering around he did not see them right away. Moving his steps along the front of the Healer Hall and around the corner, he comes face to face with Talian and... the object of his childhood fear.

Up goes his hands, klah and mugs flying through the air. Thellodar's feet backpedal as his eyes go wide and his mouth opens in a very high pitched little squeak.

Firelizards, no matter how little or sweet never failed to fill his heart with absolute terror. The big, strong healer was instantly reduced to frightened hysteria, a feeling he did not care too much to make public.

"Gah! ......Shards!...... Get it away!" Thellodar finally found his voice when he was a good ten feet away with the distance between him and that little....monster getting even wider. It did not even register at first that it was Talian that the creature was on. He would have been very pleased to see his colleague and friend. But not just yet.

Talian's brown dragon was visible to Thellodar but his large presence did not even register yet as his gaze remained glued to the flitt.

Talian was distracted by anxious thoughts of what lay inside the hall, too distracted to notice the person who'd come outside to greet them. Talian his partner said with careful consideration, flashing an image of Thellodar in the young man's mind as they came face to face with him.

Talian probably would have jumped from the sudden image without Thellodar's shout, but that didn't help matters. Talian yelped as well, jolted from his unpleasant daydreaming. His yelp caused Fellis to squeak and bury his snout in the boy's hair. One hand shot up to comfort the creature while the other went to Talian's heart, leaving him very carefully balanced on the dragon's neck. Good thing the beasts seemed to be custom-made for a man to ride! "Oh!" Talian exclaimed as he looked down, recognizing Thellodar not by his actual form but instead by the lingering image provided by Khaduceth. It was too dark to make out the other man's face by his eye alone.

"Go see Val," Talian whispered, directing Fellis away. The flit chirped and vanished, obeying the mental prompt without hesitation. Talian exhaled slowly, flighty nerves settled now that was over, and placed his hands back on  Khaduceths neck to steady himself. The dragon sent a comforting mental nudge to Talian, but the healer could sense some stern disapproval lingering in the beast. This other human had scared Fellis! Bastard.

Talian had noticed some cynicism regarding people lurking beneath Khaduceth's surface. Tal didn't mind, but he thought it was cute that the dragon seemed to think he could hide it. Talian gave the dragon a pat and then exhaled. "Um, hi there," he said, prompting Khaduceth to walk a little closer. It was a little strange to sit so high that he had to look down to see people, and in truth it made him a little uncomfortable. "Um..it's been a while. This is Khaduceth."

Khaduceth lowered his snout to sniff at Thellodar, but didn't venture close enough to be touched.

One of these days Thellodar was going to have a heart attack. With the firelizard population here, it was amazing he had not had one already. When the little beast disappeared to somewhere, Thellodar breathed for a moment and tried to collect his wits about him. He was normally pretty quiet and steadfast. Looking around his feet, he squinted in the low light and found the two mugs that went flying along with their contents. He frowned for having lost a very nice cup of klah.

Picking up the mugs, he looked back up to Talian when the man riding his dragon came a little closer and spoke.

Whether Talian followed or not, Thellodar needed a hot cup after all that nonsense. Talian knew he hated firelizards. Well, not hated per say. Terrified was more like it. But still, it was an embarrassing moment and he would rather soon forget it in the comfort of inside with a fresh mug.

"Hello." He replied back. "Yes it has been a while." Turning to the brown, he bowed his head and said politely, "I'm sorry to have frightened you. It is good to meet you Khaduceth."

To Talian he added, gesturing with the empty mug, "Want to come inside and grab some klah? I brought you some but...it didn't quite make it to its intended destination. Sorry about that."

Is he frightened of Fellis?

Yes, he is

...That is ridiculous

I know, Khaduceth. Just be patient. Talian had a hard time wrapping his head around irrational fears, though his sensibilities improved once he discovered one himself. He'd been terrified of dragons for the longest time, and even though by now he'd learned that no dragon would harm a human without cause, he still found himself uncomfortable around them. He didn't think that would ever change.

Fire lizards, though? Talian placed it alongside the many other things he would never understand about people. He figured it was a medical thing.

Khaduceth didn't reply to Thellodar, though Talian suspected the dragon was a bit flattered by the deference. There was no doubt that Khaduceth considered them the finest dragonpair on all of Pern, and while Talian hardly shared his sentiment, it was a nice confidence boost. Talian needed it most days, but he still wasn't sure what inspired all that confidence in Khaduceth. Was it his intellect? No way; dragons didn't understand that sort of thing.

"I guess," Talian said reluctantly. Khaduceth walked slowly after Thellodar, taking care not to outpace or overrun the human, and paused at the door. The dragon was rather curious.  This was the place that was so important to his bonded, the place where he wanted so desperately to be that he hadn't wanted a dragon. Khaduceth was still of the opinion that he'd saved Talian from future suicide by bonding to him, but this was something he owed the poor boy just the same.

Tal sighed and gave the dragon a pat. "Okay," he said softly, prompting the dragon to lower his head. A few awkward moments later and Talian was on the ground again, thank Faranth. He gave the dragon's snout a final pat before heading inside, careful to avoid any further conversation with Thellodar over Khaudceth. Talian was sick and tired of being congratulated for his Impression, and ftaer four months it was finally dying down! The thought of having the conversation again made him squirm with discomfort, but it would be nice to see the hall gain, yes? They could talk about that, right?

Tal bustled inside and wrung his hands, as he often did when nervous. "Have I missed anything interesting?" he asked in the usual overly-formal tone he usually used with other healers. They were colleagues, but in most cases they didn't deserve to be anything but apprentices! He felt like Katila had exceptionally poor taste in healers, with well...a couple exceptions. Himself obvious, and he'd found Thellodar to be quite competent and pleasant to work with so long as they didn't disagree. Breccan was good as well, but Talian hadn't talked to her in ages...probably for the best.

He cleared his throat nervously. "...It's been too long. Khaduceth is bigger now, though so...maybe I can come back soon." Khaduceth had been delightfully independent from the start. The dragon never tried to stop him from doing what he wanted to do, and indeed now he felt almost pushed through the door by the quiet beast. Tal let out a nervous laugh.

As Khaduceth, with Talian riding, followed him to the front of the Healer Hall, Thellodar could not help but glance back a few times and take in the sight. He had never seen Talian riding astride a dragon before. It was a sight he was going to have to get used to.

When the young master healer was lowered to the ground, Thellodar opened the main door and went inside with one last look at the young, but already huge, brown. As Talian joined him inside and asked him if he had missed anything of interest, Thellodar noted the nervous wringing of the man's hands.

"Perhaps I can catch you up in your office. I've been using it as my own while you've been gone. The klah pot is there too."

Instead of answering Talian's question right there in the hallway, he led the man to the office and headed straight for the wash basin nearby. Rinsing off the mugs, he then brought them to be filled with klah. Handing one to Talian, he stood there and said, "Three more woman are pregnant. One is showing the possible signs of twins though it is very difficult to tell yet. They are in good health. A few lashing to be tended too. Minor cuts and one broken finger from a fight. Nothing too major."

Taking a soothing drink of his klah. He closed his eyes a moment with appreciation. When he opened them again and turned his gaze to Talian, he couldn't help but say, "Congratulations on impressing. What was it like? Details please." He smiled politely over his mug.

His interest in the impression was 10% little boy curiosity and 90% medically inclined.

Talian always wrung his hands when he was nervous. He'd have been surprised if Thellodar hadn't picked up on that fact, considering the other young man's cleverness, but at the moment Talian couldn't be bothered to try concealing it. He bit his lip as he walked down the hallway, moving instinctively towards his office before Thellodar even mentioned it.

They entered the hallway just in time for Talian to hear exactly what he didn't want to hear. He froze in place for a few awkward seconds, face paling as the other young man explained that he had been making use of Talian's office.  Of course, Talian had never known Thellodar to be disrespectful towards others' property or anything else like that, but this wasn't an issue of Talian's physical stuff being intact; it was a matter of...pretty much everything else!

This was the treatment the hall gave him? He Impresses a dragon and..poof? His office is given away and he's written off like he never existed? He was really that expandable? Did the hall consider Thellodar his natural replacement? Talian had dreaded Impressing a dragon for a variety of reasons, but his greatest fear had been losing his career and being forced into a world he didn't belong in. This was like an ominous first step towards that very end!

He was too busy being paralyzed with insecurity and obsessive-compulsive disgust to pick up on the irony that this was very much an irrational fear itself. Then again, he'd admitted to himself that he didn't understand them, and if he'd bothered to analyze his own horror he wouldn't have really understood this one either. His logical side was disappointed, finding it disturbingly presumptuous that anyone else would use his office when there were others available, but his emotional side was out of control with the same observation.

Was Thellodar trying to replace him? Was it already done? Oh shards, what about his things?! He completely missed Thellodar's other questions as he stood frozen in place, eyes wide and jaw slack, and contemplated the horror that must be waiting behind that familiar door.

"Why...why would you do that?" Talian asked, tone laced with the exaggerated but wholly sincere heartbreak of a social incompetent who felt betrayed. With that pointed question, he broke out into a sprint and made his way to the door, though after rooting himself to the floor as he'd done, it was mostly just to catch up.

"I...i-it's not like I died or something! Khaduceth didn't kill me, at least not yet!" he said frantically, flinging the door open and wrinkling his nose in displeasure. Talian had indignant moments over mild changes in furnishings or decor. He wasn't exactly obsessive-compulsive, but he didn't handle change well and he was almost irreversibly bonded to his security objects and 'safe spots', which his office was definitely one of. He probably could have been convinced to let go of it if approached outright, but learning that it's ownership had been changed without his knowledge coupled with his insecurity over becoming a dragonrider...well, it was more than his oddly-wired brain was suited to handle.

Talian stood there, staring into the room like he was mourning some dead friend. Khaduceth was intensely alarmed by the whole event and watched as well, peering through Talian's eyes and quietly but frantically searching the boy's mind for the root of his anxiety. Khaduceth knew that Talian longed to return to familiar surroundings, but this entire episode was very telling for the young dragon.

His bonded really did prefer this world - whatever it was - to the world of a proper dragonrider. It really was that important to him. In that moment, Khaduceth realized just how far out of Talian's comfort zone he really was, and how hard Talian was trying to adapt just for him. Talian wasn't someone who adapted. There was something in his head that simply wouldn't allow it, and Talian had been dragged into this world kicking and screaming. He didn't adapt for his father figure B'jin, his love interest..only for Khaduceth.

Unfortunately, the dragon also had no idea what to say. He always seemed to have some gem for the healer,  even if it was a little generic or even in poor taste, but this time he just wasn't sure. He let his warmth and support wrap around the boy, however, for if he didn't do something he was worried his bonded was actually going to lose his temper at this other human!

Talian stood there, still completely shocked and looking somewhere between bewildered and heartbroken, and suddenly deflated a bit. He exhaled and wilted, then looked balefully at Thellodar. "I'm not dead," he muttered, unsure of what to say after embarrassing himself in such a way..but come on.

I cut if off there since I don't know if Thellodar would have changed it around or was just using it casually. Feel free to have at it!

Also, he was too busy being weird to answer Thell's questions, but Thell is welcome to ask them again once Tal calms his ass down. I expect Thell would have witnessed something like this a time or two in the past, but it's definitely up to you whether or not he is surprised :)