[G] [O] 740.07.26 | Evening Musings

Hot. Even in the evenings, it was hot.

Kel had her hair pulled up into a messy bun that was slightly lopsided on top of her head. Not something she normally did but she hadn't wanted her hair sticking to the back of her neck any longer. She wore loose-fitting brown pants, a lightweight white shirt that also hung loose on her. With the worn-out slippers on her feet, she looked far more like a lower cavern drudge than she did a candidate, but she honestly didn't care. It was hot and any breeze at all just brought more salty, hot air with it.

She could have stayed inside, but it was stuffy and she hadn't really wanted to be around people. She wasn't sure why, she liked people, but she had left the dining hall to brave the overbearing temperature outside instead. Mostly she was avoiding the hushed, and often not so hushed, chatter about...the eggs. She shivered slightly as she thought about those eggs. She had never seen such reactions from eggs before, never felt such... awful things from any eggs she had touched. Sadness, contempt, and fear maybe... but she couldn't even describe what she had felt from the eggs she touched. She was afraid to stand for the hatching. THAT made her stop. She had never been afraid to stand for eggs. The only thing she was starting to fear was aging out and disappointing her father and brother.

She sighed softly, kicking a small rock with her foot as she walked. There was no use thinking about that either, not really. If it happened it happened and if she was meant for a dragon she would have one. Although, she wasn't entirely sure she wanted one of these eggs. Well that was rather negative of her, wasn't it? She frowned and sat on a random rock, elbows on her knees, chin resting in her hands. Truly, any dragon would be welcome, but what if there was something wrong with them? As far as she had ever known, blues only ever caught greens, never a gold. What would those dragons be like? Would they really be all that different? Why had they reacted so poorly to not just one or two of them, but all the candidates. Surely there had to be at least one of them the hatchlings inside had liked. Right?

These thoughts and more are what raced around the young woman's head as she sat, looking slightly dejected, on a rock, as the sky slowly darkened.

Beckitt was feeling better than he had yesterday after the Touching, though still a bit rattled. As always he looked for any excuse to get outside, out of the confining walls of the caverns, so he agreed to run a message out across the Bowl. On his slow walk back, rolling up his sleeves against the heat, he spotted Kelian who seemed to have a similar idea for an evening outdoors, and waved to her but she didn’t see, instead sitting on a rock, looking dejected.

Concerned, he quickened his steps and headed over. “Hey Kel… everything okay?” He sank down next to her on the rock. “Half-mark for your thoughts…” He gave her a small smile, encouragingly. They had been in different groups for the Touching, so he didn’t know exactly what had happened, but if his own experience was anything to go by it hadn’t been anything good.

They’d known each other since they were kids; Beckitt was about a Turn younger than her, but they’d shared classes. Even if they hadn’t been the best of friends, he hoped he was at least someone she thought she could be open with.

Kel looked up at the familiar male voice and offered a small smile, but shrugged. "Hey, Beck. Yeah, as okay as it can be.", she answered honestly as she watched him sit down beside her. "Hmm...Not sure my thoughts are worth that much right now." She returned his smile with another small one of her own then looked up at the sky, looking for any hint of early stars. She hadn't been with him at the touching, she was curious to know how it went for him, but wasn't sure how to ask.

She was quiet for a few moments before dropping her gaze back to Beckett. She'd known him for next to forever, actually, she had known him forever. She was a hair older than him but they had been through every candidate lesson at least twice together. Stood for almost every clutch together too, which had been a comfort, but they had both watched so many others Impress while they were both left waiting. They had been through a lot together through the Turns, as classmates and friends. She supposed that telling him her concerns wouldn't hurt anything, he might even understand.

"Truthfully...It's those eggs Beck..", she said quietly as she sat up a bit, wrapping her arms around herself. She wanted nothing more than a dragon of her own, but there was something...off about those eggs and the babies within. She hated that she felt that way about them, but she really couldn't deny it. "Something is wrong with them...I have never felt anything like I did when I touched those eggs." She hadn't got sick, but she had very nearly and had had a headache for a long time afterward. It was all she could do to get to sleep the night before, as she had recurring dreams about what she had felt. She frowned slightly and shook her head before dropping her gaze. "I feel bad for thinking so poorly of the dragons inside those eggs, it really isn't their fault.", she added after a moment.

Beckitt chuckled as she demurred about her thoughts, understanding. They had moved to Ista the same year but hadn’t seen as much of each other as they had before with him hopping all over for hatchings she wasn’t able to stand for.

He scooted a little closer and wrapped an arm loosely around her as she hugged her arms to herself. “Hey, it’s okay… it isn’t their fault at all. It seems like the whole Weyr has been thinking terrible things at them and they just internalized it and lashed out when given the chance. But I’m sure things will work out.” He wasn’t, actually, but he hoped the more he repeated it the truer it would become. “You know half the time the dragonets are completely different when they hatch.”

“What does your family think about it,” he asked cautiously, letting the arm drop when she no longer needed the contact. “Your father and brother are both riders, right? Did you ask them about their Impressions and the Touchings before?” His own father didn’t have the time of day for him since he hadn’t Impressed, but he was friendly with plenty of riders who were more than willing to talk about the experience.

He sighed, digging in the dirt at their feet with a stick. “I was scared almost witless yesterday. Between the eggs and Thallyath’s tantrum. But I’m still going to stand. It’s not their fault Faxxoth won the flight. Unexpected things happen all the time and we need to accept that not get angry about it.”

Kel gave Beckitt a small smile and leaned on him for a moment as he spoke. She frowned a bit at that but nodded. "You're right of course. Everyone has been speaking ill of the flight, of Faxxonth, of Nerreh and Casa too I am sure. Why wouldn't the hatchlings be upset?", she said quietly, agreeing with his words. It made sense, of course. She knew that if people were talking badly about her parents, she would respond with anger too. But dragons, from all she knew, didn't quite think like humans did, so was it really all the negativity that was driving the intense bitterness coming from that little clutch? She couldn't know, and likely never would, but t plagued her thoughts regardless.

She made a little face at him then gave a nod and a smile. "True enough, I suppose. I guess we shall have to wait and see how they behave when they hatch, but I am a little afraid to stand for them. To his question of her father and brother being riders she nodded. "They are, but I have not spoken to either of them about it. I would hate to bother my father and L'ton is likely to tease me about being afraid of hatchlings.", she said the last with a roll of her eyes and a smirk. She turned in her seat a little since he had dropped his arm from her shoulders so that she could face him more as they talked. "I may ask my father tomorrow if he is not busy. It would give me an excuse to see his Ironth." That made her smile. She loved both her father's and brother's dragons, but Ironth was just the sweetest brown dragon and always let her scratch his eye ridges and sit on his paw.

Her smile faded quickly as Beck told her about his experience with the eggs. She placed a gentle hand on his shoulder, a small frown of concern for her friend. "You are right, it isn't their fault. You are right about that though. Unexpected things do happen all the time." They knew all too well about unexpected things happening, considering where they grew up. "I am not angry. I am just very worried and scared, for my friends and for those hatchlings too." She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I hope you are right, Beck. I hope they hatch differently. I hope their reactions do not overpower the love they could give and receive."

Beckitt snorted at the idea of L’ton teasing her. “He hasn’t stood lately; hatchlings can be terrifying till they Impress. Luckily we somehow forget by the day of, every time.”

He rested his hand over hers on his shoulder, giving her a smile. “I didn’t mean that you were angry, or that I was. Just,” he gestured around, “the general feeling in the Weyr.” Beckitt pulled his friend in for a hug. “At the end of the day, though, we can only control so much.”

Nutmeg flew over to the pair from where he’d been playing, pushing his way between them chirping for attention and lightening the mood. He preened and mooched scratches from Kelian shamelessly, then draped himself over her shoulders as they talked of other things, humming quietly in contentment.

Kel gave a soft chuckle at that and shook her head. "You don't know my brother. He uses any situation he can, within reason, to tease me and make me want to hit him." Although she did occasionally deserve the teasing, to be fair she didn't honestly think he would tease her about the touching, much. She made a mental note to speak to one or the other, likely whichever she could catch first.

Kel smiled at the hug and returned it. He was right, again, of course. There was little they could do about the eggs except wait and watch what happened when the time came for them to hatch. She really was still worried and thought her friend was terribly brave for wanting to face those eggs again. She, however, was not that brave. At least, she didn't think she was. "Well, at least we know that much.", she said with a small grin, speaking of his comment on what they could control.

The arrival of Beck's brown firelizard instantly had Kelian beaming a bright smile. "Hello, Nutmeg, you little darling!" She laughed a bit as the firelizard pushed himself between them, demanding attention, which she gave without hesitation, even though he wasn't hers. She was a little surprised when he settled across her shoulders, humming at them. "Ah, I am sort of jealous you know.", She said, making a playful face at Beck. "One day I am going to have a firelizard of my own. Hopefully, it will like me as much as yours seems to.", she teased lightly. Both her father and his weyrmate had firelizards and plenty of other people around the weyr. She would have one too, if she was patient enough and lucky.

Beckitt laughed at his firelizard’s antics and switched to sitting next to her instead of a hug while she gave the little mooch attention. “Little airhead,” he said. “I’d promise you an egg if he Flew, but you know how silly the greens are. We’d never find the clutch. And he’d never catch a gold.” He tickled under the brown’s chin with a smile but left him perched on her shoulder where he seemed comfortable.

“Feeling any better?” he asked after a while. He’d wrapped an arm around her and let her lean on him again, both taking comfort from being close to someone else. Kitt sighed, rubbing her back lightly. “Tomorrow’s another day, right?”

Kel gave a small laugh when Beck spoke. "Yes, and as much fun as scavenger hunts can be, hunting firelizards eggs could go on for days." She continued to scratch the little brown that had perched himself on her shoulder. "Hmm, don't count him out. Even brown dragons can catch a gold once in a while. Nutmeg might just get lucky one of these days."

Kel smiled at her friend and gave his question a brief moments thought before giving a little nod. "Actually, yes. Thank you, Beck." She took the offering to lean on him again, his firelizard wiggling a bit so that he was somehow touching both humans at the same time. She smiled again and took a breath then let it out slowly. "Yes. Tomorrow is definitely another day and will be better than today."

She couldn't know that for certain, obviously, but she thought it was a good, encouraging thing to say regardless. She had to believe tomorrow would be better and he really wanted to believe that those eggs, those little babies, would in fact be okay once they hatched and Impressed.