World of Pern
Latest Updates

2023/08/04 Hello loves! While I haven't been writing, I have been working on updating some issues that have been hanging around on the layout! The Character change box is now at the bottom of the page, beside the up/down arrows! Green and Gold dragon flight dates have been shifted to the bottom of the page, where the (useless!) discord widget was located. Where the dragon flights were in the header, is now replaced by a Monthly Event box! This will be updated at the start of each month, with a fun mini-event you can take part in, if you want to! Thistle!
2023/01/07 Welcome to the New Year! We are now ELEVEN years old! Thank you, all of you, for your love and writing! I am looking forward to spending another year with youall! In addition, a new Default colour scheme is in progress and will hopefully be available soon! All my love! ThistleProse
2022/07/29 Gold Malvayth and Bronze Xyxyth clutch is Hatching! Come and join the shenannigans 743.08.03 | NIGHT STALKERS HATCHING and bring the popcorn!
2022/05/11 Gold Malvayth has Flown, caught by Bronze Xyxyth of A'tay. Their Hatching will be PC, and take place in Telgar in August around the 20-22nd! Update your Candidate Applications and prepare for some fun!
2022/04/21 New default layout! I hope you enjoy it! If you find any bugs, please report them in the discord #bug-squishing channel!
05/JUL It’s Hatching time!! Come take part in the shenanigans here
30/JUN Gold Thallyath of Ista Weyr has laid a clutch! More information here
27/JUN A bluerider, and then a greenrider, are found dead. More information here
25/JUN The Touching is up! Take part here
30/MAY After the Touching, many Candidates found themselves preyed upon in the form of their food. More information here
18/MAY Another goldrider - Ameris of Benden - is attacked. More information here
05/MAY Multiple individuals are attacked whilest out of the Weyr! More information here
04/MAY Take a chance OOC and guess who you think the murderer is! You can win prizes! More information here
03/MAY Goldrider Cazan and her twin brother Cazelarias are attacked. More information here
24/APR Goldrider Ashara of Fort is murdered by two brownriders. More information here
12/APR Searchrider B’jin was attacked at Telgar Weyr, surffering a slash to his throat. While in Benden, bluerider B’dor is found dead in his weyr. More info here
05/APRMore attacks occurred today. More information here
03/APRMultiple individuals found their death this day; more information here and here
28/MAR Tragedy has struck again! Across all the Weyrs, multiple people - primarily dragonriders - have fallen ill after eating muffins. There have been multiple deaths, and others are in criticle condition. More information here
24/MAR Weyrwoman Ameris and her son, Rislan, poisoned! More information here
18/MAR Benden’s Weyrleader M’ris and his children have been poisoned! Resulting in sickness and death. More information here
18/MAROn 18.03.742 Bronzerider A’dris of Vyaniorth was found dead in his personal bathing pool. He appears to have drowned after drinking an excess of alcohol. Afterwards it was realized that Machiya of Gold Cameth from Telgar Weyr had disappeared. Having never arrived at her destination, it is suspected she had an accident between.
11/MAR Gold Racoth of Donmaline went between taking Bronze Beruth of T’rel with her shortly after she had been caught, due to T’rel strangling Donmaline. He did not survive. more info
25/FEB Congratulations and thank-you to Guest for taking on a moderator role! <3
14/FEB Stars Above PC Hatching Link
06/JAN :o new layout is a WiP. Please report bugs in Discord.
01/JAN Merry Christmas, and Happy New Year!




Currently: Spring 03.745 al
Monthly Event
2024-February
Details: Link

Welcome to the Month of Lovetm! This month's Monthly Event is all about Romance, whether it is asking someone out on a date, or getting sweaty between the sheets! Anything and everything counts, if it even looks sideways like it could be related to Valentine Day -- including lover's spats, or breaking up, Flights Wins (or Flight Losses!). Honestly, this month has a huge opportunity for interpertation, so go wild!



2023-December
Details: Link

Ahh, the fresh snow, the crisp air, the naked trees... welcome to Winter! Or, just the Colder Months for those in the more Northern Weyrs, while Ista is just... not as hot. But it is time to enjoy the end of the Turn, so folks should get together, spend some time gossiping, and drinking Hot Chocolate (alcohol and marshmallows opional)... does Pern even have marshmallows????? (they do now!)



2023-November
Details: Link

Feel like bitching? Wanna take part in a brawl? Or bet on someone? Take part in Brawls and Bitching this month! Boo-yeah!



2023-October
Details: Link

Thistle flunked this month; You can still post until the end of November as a result <3
Experience, tell or hide from a Spooky Story!



2023-September
Details: Link

The flu is running rampant, colds are clogging noses, and someone might have lost a limb?



2023-August
Details: Link

Partake this month by going fishing... or anything that occurs while fishing, or dealing with fish!



Latest Posts



Wake Up! [B'jin + others welcome/encouraged as well]

Pronouns
Discord
{hidden}

Threads
31
Posts
579 & 3,342 IC

Written By: ZZZ Archived
#1
When the healer's eyes opened, the first that to greet him was pain.

He let out a soft groan as his mind caught up with his body. His stomach ached and his throat burned. His limbs felt heavy and his head was pounding. But, he was alive. He inhaled deeply, ignoring the discomfort that came with it. It felt good to feel cool, fresh air in his lungs. It gave him a flourish of delight to see the morning sunlight creeping in through the windows. More than anything, it delighted him to see B'jin sleeping there beside him, undoubtedly after watching over him for most of the night.

Loved indeed,

His quiet revelry was interrupted by a heaving in his throat. He coughed lightly and cringed from the horrid soreness. It was a small price to pay. He lay there for several long minutes, tawny eyes fixed on the ceiling as he considered what he'd almost done. He still felt terrible. He figured he would be sick for a few days to come, and it may be a while before his stomach and throat completely healed. He was alive, though. Gloriously, gloriously alive.

I wouldn't be waking up right now without you he thought fondly, looking at B'jin and allowing a smile to creep across his thin lips. It was one of the most sincere, organic smiles he'd ever produced. He took great care not to rouse the greenrider, remaining quiet and still as he thought about the previous night. He regretted his actions now, but he felt oddly refreshed. He'd always thought of suicide as an eventual way out of his problems, be them Northern or Southern. Now he knew for certain that it was a mistake....He couldn't guarantee it, but at that moment, he felt certain that the notion would never haunt him again.

It just wasn't what he wanted.

He sighed and rolled onto his side, but he quickly realized it wasn't to his liking. He shifted again and suppressed another cough. He didn't want to teat his throat up any more than he already had. At least he was safe, though. The poison would linger in his system and make him ill, but the danger was passed. All thanks to B'jin.

Talian rested there, wondering what time it was and how long it would be before someone came to him about what had happened. Larrikith had made sure everyone knew something was afoot! Talian wondered if news of his actions would put some of his friends off.  He hoped not, but the best he could do was be honest; he'd make a mistake, but made an important realization in the process: he wanted to live.

It was delightfully liberating. He felt like a new man.

He contemplated his situation for a while until he felt B'jin stir beside him. He cut his eyes towards the greenrider. "Good morning," he said in soft greeting, his tone laden with gratitude and warmth, though still on the shaky, meek side. Tal would never get over his shyness. He rolled onto his side again, ignoring the discomfort in favor of smiling at B'jin.

"B'jin...I can never repay you for what you've done for me..."

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 500 Posts!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

B'jin
of Green Larrikith

Date of Birth
23.06.683 AL, 61
Height
5'9
Eyes
Brown
Build
Sturdy, softly fit
Hair
Blonde, Silver

Threads
102
Posts
864

Written By: ThistleProse
#2
B'jin groaned softly, fighting off the very bad idea of waking up. Waking up would be very, very unwise. He wasn't quite sure why that was, but more than any morning in his entire life, he knew that waking up was not something he should be doing. Unfortunately, he had already lost that battle, as a soft voice greeted him. By so doing, it dragged his lingering consciousness to the forefront, and B'jin hissed between his teeth as his senses kicked into gear.

"Shards!" His eyes flickered open, and he blinked several times before focusing on Talian. He was on his side, facing the young man. His right arm was numb from being laid upon, but judging by the obvious numbweed induced rash creeping up it, that was a good thing. Pins and needles were nothing compared to the pain that would shoot up once the numbness wore off. His left elbow was throbbing with a gentle insistence that told him something not good was going on there, too. He was almost afraid to move, lest something else hurt in the process. The greenrider had a high pain tolerance, but he was also mentally and physically exhausted and as a result, was unsure how much he could handle right about then.

"No, it is not!" he snapped irritably to Talian's greeting, scowling at the boy's happy face. "There is nothing good about mornings!" Mumbling under his breath about 'young people' and 'morning' and 'good' and 'the shards were those two words put together anyway?' B'jin jerked his arm out from under Talian with little regard to the younger man, sucking a sharp breath in between his teeth as the pins and needles flared. "Shards!"

B'jin blinked, once, then turned to frown at Talian as he cradled his numb arm, looking confused. "Repay me?" he asked, confusion utterly drenched in every syllable before realisation flashed across his face like lightning and he promptly fell off the bed with a loud crash. Swearing, with his left hand rubbing the back of his head, B'jin scrambled up on his knees, and peered at Talian with huge, round brown eyes.

"Thank Faranth!" He gasped, forgetting his soreness (even his damnable legs were painful this morning!) B'jin threw himself at Talian, wrapping his arms around the boy tightly and rocking slightly. He was crying, again, but laughter was in the breathy sobs. "Thank Faranth," he whispered, kissing Talian's temple. He leaned back, hands gently holding Talian's face as he just stared at him with delight before kissing the boy's forehead and wrapping him back up in a hug.

"I thought I'd lost you!"

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 500 Posts!PA - 750 Posts!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

Pronouns
Discord
{hidden}

Threads
31
Posts
579 & 3,342 IC

Written By: ZZZ Archived
#3
While normally he'd have been worried by  B'jin's groggy crankiness, today he was too pleased. He was pleased with himself for feeling so sharding happy to be alive, and especially pleased with B'jin for...everything. "This one is," the healer said in a sweet, muted voice as he looked back at the man who may as well have been his father. "The best morning I've ever had, I believe."

His eyes widened as B'jin pitched backwards and went off the edge of the bed. "B'jin, are you okay?" he asked meekly, creeping forward as best he could to peek over the edge.

He quickly found himself wrapped in that familiar embrace again. His body protested the sudden motion, sending sharp pangs through his guts and limbs that made him squeak in pain, but he didn't resist. B'jin could tie his shattered body in knots for all he cared. "I'm still here," he said, carefully wrapping his arms around the man and letting out a hoarse, timid, but exceptionally jovial laugh. "All thanks to you, B'jin..."

He stayed that way for some time, his shoulder occasionally quivering with silent tears shed directly into the greenrider's shoulder. "Thank you so much....I almost made the worst mistake..." he said lovingly. He produced a muffled cough, though much to his delight, there was no blood. It terrified him now to think bout the previous evening, how they'd rested side by side while waiting laboriously for the remedies to either work or not. If Talian had felt helpless during that time, he could only imagine how helpless  B'jin had felt.

After some minutes, his baser instincts took over. He was a healer, and B'jin was hurt! A rash here, a bruise there...the evening hadn't been kind to B'jin, either. "I'm sorry I put you through that," Tal said sadly, his face falling a bit as he reached out to examine the rash. He knew he was in no position to be treating someone, though. He could barely sit up himself. "You should take some fellis..."

Hi eyes widened subtly as he realized what he was doing. With another faint laugh, he relaxed again, propping himself up on one elbow and he cast a weary but radiant smile on his friend. There was a stretch of silence before he spoke again.

"B'jin," he said. "I...." he looked down for a moment, gathering himself. "Everything I said last night, about having no control over my life....Well, I'm not going to say I'm sorry. I meant every word of it, and it's....well, it's all still true." He cleared his throat out of habit and quickly grimaced in pain. Well that was a horrible idea. "But...well, I don't want you to worry about that stuff anymore."

He slid down onto the bed, nestling himself contentedly to his pillow. "I dunno....that wasn't worth it at all.  I thought it was the only way, but I think living like this is better than not living at all. I guess I just wasn't thinking..." he said, trailing off just a bit to swallow the lump in his throat. "It wasn't fair of me to do that to you, or Eri, or Val, or Lym..." he said, rattling on a bit as he thought about the people he was lucky to have. He sighed and relaxed against the pillow, pulling the covers up to his chin with one hand. "...I promise I won't do anything like that again," he said, curling up and making himself small without taking his eyes away from B'jin's.

"...This is my home now." He sounded more resigned and defeated than happy, but there was a coolness and steadiness there that echoed his decision to accept his fate.


PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 500 Posts!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

B'jin
of Green Larrikith

Date of Birth
23.06.683 AL, 61
Height
5'9
Eyes
Brown
Build
Sturdy, softly fit
Hair
Blonde, Silver

Threads
102
Posts
864

Written By: ThistleProse
#4
Aware of Talian's squeak of pain, B'jin was gentle with his grip but no less fierce in his determination not to let the young man go. He'd almost lost him! He couldn't believe his good fortune, at having managed to pull him, pull them both, through. Faranth was watching over them last night! Allowing Talian to slip out of his grip, B'jin stood up carefully from where he was kneeling, and sat heavily on the foot of Talian's bed, grimacing as he allowed the young healer to look at his arm.

"Probably," he muttered, taking his arm back as Talian made himself comfortable. "But that stuff knocks me around." Maybe he'd always been given heavier doses to account for his allergy to Numbweed, or perhaps he was effected more strongly by that plant, too. Whatever the case, B'jin was liable to pass out if he drank it, and he'd just woken up, however grumpily. Grumpy, grumpy- "Larrikith!" B'jin used the silence that Talian unintentionally gave him to search out his dragon's mind. His face paled when he failed to find her straight away, before relief touched his muscles when he discovered her, still outside, and completely gone to the world. Her mind a hazy swirl of tangled emotions, he took the time to filter through them and sort them out, buffering the negative aside in favour of leaving her with sweeter emotions - such as his elation at have Talian alive and well - to give her sweeter dreams and, hopefully, a sweeter disposition when she awoke. He wasn't going to hold his breath, however.

Opening his eyes slowly with a lazy smile, B'jin turned his bright gaze upon Talian with quiet assurance that the world was as it should be, albeit somewhat sore and tender, before frowning as Talian spoke. His left eyebrow arched slightly as he gave Talian an amused, slightly tired expression. "Talian, no one is in control of their life, and especially not for the first twenty turns or so. No one is exempt from that." B'jin paused a moment. "Talerian was undoubtedly stricter on you than others parents may be, but it doesn't change the fact that your life, my life, every brat born within this Weyr, and those born North; Their lives are controlled by the adults that surround them. My own life, controlled by my parents, then my masters," He shook his head, "Impressing Larrikith is a moot point, Talian, because while I probably would have made it to Master, I would still be under the thumb of the Master Harper. Impressed to Larri, I was under the thumb of everyone that out ranked me, and because of Larri's small size, that was just about everyone. We can out maneuver just about anyone in the sky, we are an amazing Search pair, and my candidates always Impress well - but being a wingrider is expected and being a Searcher is not a rank of any note, unless you happen to nab the next Queenrider and she takes a fancy to you." He shook his head slightly, letting his words roll around the room before falling away. "The only ones in control of their own life, are the Holdless, and I don't know about you, Kiddo, but I like having a little more stability than that, even if it does come by sitting on the bottom of the shit heap."

"It was incredibly selfish," B'jin said, and his tone was very matter of fact without being very emotive at all. It wasn't so much that there was no emotion involved in the words, as that what he was saying was simply a fact. It was, as far as he was concerned. He wasn't going to lecture Talian on how wrong it was for him to do such a thing, because he was pretty sure Talian knew that much. He wasn't going to threaten to not be there if he did it again, because as much as it would kill him, B'jin probably would be there to drag him out of the mess. Either that, or he'd have Larri drop the kid between. At least that was clean and tidy! The man gazed down absently at his chest, noting with disgusted interest the amount of dried brown blood that was smeared across it and soaked through it. He would need a new shirt.

"You owe me a new shirt." He said mildly, apparently accepting Talian's promise at face value without the need to expand upon it. If Talian said he wouldn't do it again, B'jin would believe him and accept it as truth. He wasn't about to tell the boy that if he had really wanted to die, there were two hundred odd dragons living in their Weyr, and while suicide was frowned upon by the non-bonded, it was still an accepted part of their life; no one was expected to live if they truly wanted to die. It was a lot messier and much easier to clean up after dropping someone between than the use of poison. B'jin was pretty sure it was probably a lot less painful, but that it would undoubtedly be incredibly cold and lonely.

When B'jin shuddered, dreading the day it was his turn to take that eternal trip between, Larrikith stirred. The green dragon's multi flected eyes opened and stared up at those that hovered over her with a blank expression, her mind befuddled. Why was she outside in the grass? Her hide was grey tinged and she felt so tired B'jin? she cried, feebly, and struggled to collect herself into a more dignified curled up position, eyes flashing with fear.

"Easy, Larri. We're alright, baby girl. Are you okay?" B'jin's expression was tender, his voice a soft murmur. I hurt. No. You hurt. Her eyes flashed, whirling faster as her head spun towards the direction B'jin was in. "I'm fine, dear. Do you want me?" His gaze met Talian's, loath to leave the young healer, but itching for the comfort of his dragon. No. Stay. I will come to you. Larrikith groaned as she climbed to her feet, and wobbled preciously. She glanced at the door that lead down the hall and then back at herself for a moment, judging. She was round, but she was small. With an expression of determination, the little green shoved men and women alike out of her way before nosing the double doors open and squishing her way down the hall, leaving a trail of destruction in her wake. A moment later, she shoved her head and neck into the room B'jin and Talian were occupying.

Best of both worlds, she said softly, touching lightly on Talian's mind. She gave a creel of love as B'jin threw himself off the bed and wrapped his arms around her face. The dragon lowered herself to the floor, curling up on the other side of the door way, her shoulders pressed into the small panes. B'jin followed her down, her head resting across his legs as he stroked her face and muttered unintelligible reassurances.


[sup]Get past the big green butt if you can LOL; Climb over her if you want. I don't care XD[/sup]

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 500 Posts!PA - 750 Posts!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

V'ler
of Blue Veeth

Date of Birth
21.08.707, 37
Height
5’10
Eyes
Green
Build
Average
Hair
Brown, shaggy

Threads
19
Posts
429

Written By: SunsetWay
#5
Valerian hadn’t woken when Larrikith started her death keel but when dragons all over the Weyr joined in, it reached the young Harper’s ears and had him jolting awake. He had no idea what the noise was or why it was sounding and leaving him particularly grumpy. It had been partly due to that grumpy state that called for justice against whoever woke him that got him out of bed to investigate but it was also thanks to his naturally curious side that made for a great gossip-gathering Harper. Clothes had been quickly tossed on and he followed a few other people that seemed to be headed for the Healing Hall, likely guided by their distressed dragons. A distressed Larrikith wasn’t what he expected to find.

He watched in horror as she seemed to call out in pain while viciously guarding the doors into the building. It was a bit shocking to see her so violent and flinging someone aside when they tried to approach her when he was used to seeing her spunky and playful personality. Was B’jin injured? Then wouldn’t she want him to receive help? He heard whisperings that B’jin must be dying for Larrikith to act in such a manner but Valerian simply refused to believe that out of sheer stubbornness since he considered the cheerful greenrider something akin to a friend. But with every cry Larrikith made, Valerian fought an urge to go to her. He was arrogant but not arrogant enough to believe she would recognize him or even care that it was him and let him near. He did, however, fully believe his chances of dying by means of Larrikith had shot up two hundred percent since meeting the little green but that didn’t mean he had to completely offer himself up on a platter for her devouring.

It was only when she suddenly went quiet and fell over that Valerian panicked. There was a hush amongst the crowd and no one seemed to move for what seemed like hours but acting simply on impulse, the Harper was the first to rush to her side to check on her. He had no training in that field and quickly moved aside when others followed his lead but he stayed near, watching over the dragon he had befriended, hating that he couldn’t do more than send encouraging thoughts towards her in case she happened to touch upon his mind.

He wasn’t sure how long his silent vigil was held when Larrikith woke and soon after was making her way through the hall. That was more like the pesky green he liked! Jumping to his feet, Valerian was quick to follow and nearly laughed aloud at the sight of the dragon trying to wriggle into the room he could hear B’jin in. At least they knew her rider was fine but Valerian’s curiosity had to be sated and he needed to know what had gone on. A couple of people stared at the greyish-green obstacle, wondering out loud how to get her to move so they could assess the situation but Valerian had his own idea. Thanks to B’jin’s oh-so-helpful hint of climbing up Larrikith to sit atop her, the dark-haired man stepped up to her side, grabbed a fat roll, and scrambled up the muted green hide, sending thoughts to her as he did so she knew who was being so bold. Once he was on her back, he made his way down her neck, squeezing through the opening left thanks to her smaller size.

“B’jin, what did you do last night? You have blood on your…” Valerian’s words were lost as movement from the other side of the room caught his attention, draining the colour from his face. Talian was lying in the bed. Confusion was plainly written on the Harper’s face as he looked from one man to the other, trying to figure out who had been the one bleeding and close to death; assuming the whisperings had been correct. Still unsure over everything but the fact that B’jin had Larrikith comforting him and Talian was sitting alone, Valerian went to his friend, sitting on the edge of the bed without invitation and taking in Talian’s appearance from head to toe, concern etched into his features.

“What happened, Talian? I’m no expert but despite you being great at your job, I don’t think B’jin would be up hugging his dragon if you had just performed your second surgery of your career.”

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

Pronouns
Discord
{hidden}

Threads
33
Posts
364 & 3,342 IC

Written By: ZZZ Archived
#6
The night before Erisi had made it back to his room late, and one could only assume what he had been doing, because the sequential events following his return to his room had him in the mood to not talk. Hanging on his door was a bandana, and not even a fashionable one by Erisi's estimations, never mind that it was stained with blood. He would have assumed it to be some sort of prank, one that he could reasonably get irritable over and have a valid excuse to be irritable with others over. But, he recognized the piece of cloth. Erisi was an observant young man, even if his attitude made it seem as if he were unaware of all things but those that directly pertained to him. He knew the owner of the bandana well, and for a good few moments was confused as to why it was on his door.

If Talian was trying to hit on him, he was doing a really bad job.

The young Harper had stuffed the stained fabric in the front of his pants pocket, unsure what to make of the weird gesture. Erisi had known that Talian was sad, 'depressed' even (though Erisi had not fully grasped the concept of depression to put any serious thought into it), but there was no way his mind would make the jump from having Talian's bandana on his door to that the man had pitted himself in danger. Rather, it stirred a vague curiosity in the Harper, enough to keep from entering his room. A good idea would be to visit Talian and find out what the young Healer had intended. Oh, Master Healer. Sometimes Erisi forgot that. It wasn't an important matter for him, not in comparison with other things. Rank and standing meant something for people he hadn't already befriended.

Before he even made it to Talian's room to see if he was there, chaos had erupted. A dragon was keening loudly, and everyone seemed to instantly respond to it. He knew enough to know that something was wrong, but he wouldn't find out until later. Erisi had no desire to tangle with a green dragon guarding the entrance to Healer Hall. He had stayed back, and heard the whisperings of rumors floating from tongue to ear. It wasn't until the next morning that anyone had feasible access to the Hall. Talian hadn't returned to his room, which only stirred Erisi's capacity for concern even more than rumors alone. It was why, inevitably, Erisi did come back.

The room wasn't hard to find - he had properly guessed that it was the one the green dragon was hovering around again. Getting around her proved to be a difficult and somewhat embarrassing task (at least no one could really witness his grand struggle against Larrikith). He recognized the dragon, though pitting a name to that hide color was difficult for him. He wasn't on friendly terms with most dragons, or any terms at all. His avoidance of them was clear, believing that by avoiding them, he wouldn't adjust to an environment he hated. There was the hope that the dragonets would pick up on his attitude in the upcoming Hatching, and avoid him even more for it.

He peeked into the room, and was suddenly very bothered by the fact that he recognized everyone in it. Valerian obviously was well, and that B'jin rider was slouching off with his dragon, who had been slouching around the entryway (they were a perfect match, apparently). That left one individual left to identify, and when Erisi's eyes fixed on Talian he paled. He did not say anything, and the expression on his face had hardened. Erisi wasn't the sort of person who displayed his vulnerable emotions, so he was going through a tremendous effort to hide the sudden tornado of feelings as he pinpointed Talian resting on the bed. His Healer friend was a mess. Some part of Erisi's mind probably suspected what happened, but for its own safety, ignored it.

The Harper stood back, letting Valerian press inquiries upon Talian. The lack of emotion suddenly on his face spoke enough for his sudden grief and confusion. His arms folded atop each other at his chest, fingers curling into the fabric of his sleeve. For now, Erisi retained his peace, but by his very nature he was not the silent type, and Talian had only a few minutes before he had to really deal with Erisi's presence.

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

Pronouns
Discord
{hidden}

Threads
31
Posts
579 & 3,342 IC

Written By: ZZZ Archived
#7
Talian exhaled softly. These was truth to B'jin's words, but the young healer also masked a bit of disappointment that B'jin still didn't seem to be listening to him. The whole problem was that he finally had control of his own life, briefly. It was indescribably frustrating to lose it. It didn't matter anymore, though. He smiled sadly and decided to let it go. He still felt like a captive, but after trying to remove himself from the situation and realizing he still valued his life more than his freedom, he didn't think he had room to say much. That was just how things had to be. He wondered idly if he'd ever be actually happy with it. He imagined he could settle for be content, thought.

"I know," he said afterwards. He puzzled him a bit, since he heard suicide discussed rather often by dragonriders. He'd concluded that it was culturally okay for them to do, but not anyone else. It was another example of their amazing bias and perhaps even bigotry. He wrinkled his nose a bit, realizing at once that he still hated the Weyr. Things couldn't change overnight. He frowned a little and pouted apologetically at B'jin. "...I wouldn't have changed my mind if you hadn't come along. I couldn't stand the thought of doing that to you," he whispered.

None of it changed the fact that he, in his own mind, had no future. He looked at B'jin with a confused haze in his eyes. "I just don't know what to do now. No girlfriend, no career, nothing really to look forward to," he said, the corner of his mouth twitching slight as he spoke. His words carried less spite than before, just confusion and a distant hint of sadness. "...The only thing I got out of that is whatever I do, I don't want to die..." he said. "And well...You and the others are a better family than my old one." He seemed to perk up a bit at the end there. He was less giving a speech and more just thinking out loud trying to find a way to justify his existence. Even still, none of these unpleasant thoughts could completely drown his utter delight in being actually alive.

"Thank you both so much. I owe you a lot more than just a new shirt..."

He watched silently as Larrikith made her way into the room. For once, he didn't cringe at the sight of her. He had no idea what to make of the green dragon now, though he didn't truly understand how much of a role she'd played in the entire thing. That alone was one of the reasons he hesitated. He knew she must have participated, she just didn't know how much. He smiled a little, amusd by how she'd only just managed to wiggle her way inside. Were he on the floor instead of on a sickbed, he'd porobably have panicked over a dragon crawling through what he was slowly coming to think of as his healing hall. Hey, there was an idea...

Before he knew it, he had visitors.  His eyes widened as Valerian made his entrance, looking confused and concerned; an odd set of expressions to see on the usually mellow and somewhat unknowable harper, which made Tal's heart race all the more. His friends! Well, one of them, and he couldn't imagine the others being far behind. He felt a pleasant warmth in his chest as he realized exactly that; he had people he could actually expect to be worried about him. In spite of himself, he realized there was a knot in his throat.

"No, Val. No surgery. I-"

He was cut off as a second person made their appearance, this time his temperamental friend Erisi. Tal froze, eyes widening momentarily with fear, but primarily with joy. He adored Eri, but he also feared how the man would react to the news. Val would probably be more understanding.

Probably.

His excitement at seeing them withered when he realized what he was going to have to tell them. He supposed he could lie about it to cover himself, but if he knew anything about a Weyr, it's that there were no secrets.


"I'm glad to see you guys," he said meekly, his old habit of wringing his hands reappearing as he laced his fingers together in his lap. "I guess I have a lot of explaining to do..."

An explain he did, with nervous frowns and gasping breath, starting with the previous day's decision and leading up to the very minute before they appeared. Once he started to speak, it was hard for him to hold in. He didn't cry and managed to mostly avoid the telltale rasp in his voice, but there was also a great slant of modesty in his voice.  He was ashamed of himself, but in an odd way, happy that it had happened.

"That was the stupidest thing I've ever done," he said, looking away, fearful to meet their reactions. "And I'm sorry. I hope you can forgive me."

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 500 Posts!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

V'ler
of Blue Veeth

Date of Birth
21.08.707, 37
Height
5’10
Eyes
Green
Build
Average
Hair
Brown, shaggy

Threads
19
Posts
429

Written By: SunsetWay
#8
Valerian turned to see who else had followed him in when Talian hesitated and glanced to the entrance. He nodded in greeting to Erisi though he wasn’t quite sure why his friend was there unless he knew Talian had gotten himself into some sort of trouble because there was no way Erisi would worry over a dragonrider. His suspicions were confirmed seconds later when Talian found the courage to explain what had gone on and the harm he intended to inflict on himself, in silence and secret, but B’jin and Larrikith thankfully ruined that plan.

He listened in silence to the entire tale but emotions rose with each passing word and horrible description. When the apology came, and Valerian knew the healer meant every word, it was the final push against the restraints holding his emotions in check, the veneer of a calm expression starting to crack to show the pain and even betrayal he felt. Was it wrong of him to feel that way? Valerian wasn’t sure since he had never been placed in such a situation before and never had it happen around him to know how others reacted but he didn’t think he could react in any other way. A smile while shrugging the entire thing off wouldn’t work and neither would staying silent until someone else spoke up.

So he gave in to following his emotions and took Talian’s cue to just talk and see where it got him. Unfortunately for the healer the first instinct Valerian had and followed through on once he came out of his shock over the whole thing was to reach out and smack Talian upside the head, barely refraining from delivering a proper fist to the man’s face. “Incredibly stupid, you mean. Not to mention selfish and cowardly.” Green eyes narrowed and hardened as he spoke, uncaring that B’jin and Erisi were witnessing the exchange and possibly not taking his physical demonstration too well. “Aren’t we all friends? Aren’t we all in this together? You could just throw Eri and me away like it was nothing, leaving us to deal with a new life and your death because you thought you were the only one feeling lost and ruled over by people you don’t like?”

Valerian didn’t speak on his take of being Stolen since he was fairly neutral on the whole thing, having no strong emotions one way or the other. While he was adjusting, it still wasn’t his ideal life and like everyone else he had days where he wished he was in the north again but having his small group of chosen friends in Allendris, Erisi, Talian, and even B'jin and Larrikith, helped him cope with those days. It was just obvious to him that he had a more accepting personality than others and didn’t feel the need to push people into catching up with his settling in. He knew Talian and Erisi didn’t like it here and he tried to help them in his own little ways. Now to hear Talian didn’t seem to care for the attempts or their friendship left Valerian stinging from the slap of reality.

He stood, intent on turning and perhaps even leaving but ended up not moving. He couldn’t walk away from Talian, even now. The man learned his lesson, realized what he had wasn’t as bad as he thought, and knew he had hurt the friends he couldn’t be without. With a long sigh that let off the remainder of his steam, Valerian sat back down, a much softer gaze now on Talian. “I’m glad B’jin found you and there was a way to undo your stupidity. Like I told you before, I like you and value your friendship just like I do Eri’s.” He wouldn’t apologize about smacking Talian though. The man deserved that.

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

Pronouns
Discord
{hidden}

Threads
31
Posts
579 & 3,342 IC

Written By: ZZZ Archived
#9
Tal barely found time to flinch from the blow. It was a jolt to his already fractured body, but he barely seemed to notice, his head turning only slightly in response. He closed his eyes and took in a sharp breath, listening stoically as Valerian went on his rant. The words hurt, but they were exactly what Talian expected and figured he deserved to hear. He already knew it all, of course. He'd been repeating the same lines to himself ever since waking.

It was strange how someone could anticipate something and think they'd done it justice, only to find in reality they were so very far off the mark. He thought he was ready to face his friends' anger, like he knew what they would say and knew how to take it, but he found now that he really wasn't. He made no effort to defend himself as he listened to Valerian's words, heart throbbing uncomfortably in his temples. Tal feared horribly that the conversation would end with a severed friendship. How arrogant was he to think he could do something like this and not alienate anyone he loved?

He finally opened his eyes to see Valerian taking his seat again. The harper's words were soothing, and ultimately more than Talian thought he deserved after everything that had happened. "Thank you," he said, voice shaking in subtle fear, though he looked more at ease than he had in quite a while. "I deserved that. Everything you said is right," Tal said, eyes lighting up in empathy. He knew exactly those emotions Val had described, though he hadn't expected to see Valerian expressing anything like that. Val seemed so passive. Talian never would have thought his friend was hiding such pain.

"But you're right. We're all in this together," he said, distant hints of optimism lurking in his tone. "For the first time in a long time,  I feel like I'm going to be all right. Thank you so much, Val..." He turned his eyes to Eri was well, his quiet way of saying that all his words were seconded for Erisi - and maybe even especially.

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 500 Posts!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

B'jin
of Green Larrikith

Date of Birth
23.06.683 AL, 61
Height
5'9
Eyes
Brown
Build
Sturdy, softly fit
Hair
Blonde, Silver

Threads
102
Posts
864

Written By: ThistleProse
#10
B'jin rubbed his left hand over his face, careful to keep his right well away; he did not need to put the damned rash all over himself, and sighed. It wasn't that he wasn't that he wasn't listening, so much as he couldn't understand Talian fixation with freedom. Perhaps it was because B'jin had already tasted literal freedom during the Banishment, and wouldn't wish that on anyone. He wasn't sure, but his expression was a little sad as he let Talian drop the subject. The next one made him squirm a little to see the confusion in Talian's eyes, so he offered up an explanation.

"Suicide is an acceptable escape, Talian." B'jin said lowly, his voice serious and his eyes focusing on Talian's own. "A dragonrider would never deny someone an escape, but we usually encourage a drop between." He brushed his hair out of his face, frowning slightly. "Mostly, it's only when a dragon dies, and doesn't take their rider between with them." The horror B'jin felt at that situation was clear in his eyes. "I've dropped my share of mates into between." He shuddered. "The plague." Oh, the horror of those Turns. The dragon keen had gone on endlessly, just about from the start. So many lives lost! So many riders left, dragonless and insane.

"I don't want to lose you," the greenrider said softly, his tone serious as he leaned towards Talian, eyes dark and intense. "But we would drop you between if you really, really wanted to go." All considered, this was better. There was no coming back from between!


Larrikith twisted her head in B'jin's arms, to peer over her shoulder as she felt someone's grubby hands grab a hold of her and haul themselves atop her body. She was too tired to go poking in the mind of whomever it was, which was probably a good thing because she had rather unique ways of making a mind probing particularly painful. She was also too exhausted to send them flying off her tiny body, which was lucky, too, because there were a lot of walls and not a lot of space. When Valerian appeared in her line of sight, her eyes whirled from mildly annoyed to mildly amused and she gave his shoulder a gentle nuzzle as he passed her, realising with a start that he'd been one of those hovering over her when she'd awoken.

He kept his brat alive, Larrikith whispered into Valerian's mind, her tone lazy and soft as she nudged B'jin's chest before laying her head across his lap, and letting the man stroke her head and face lovingly. Having heard Larrikith's comment to the younger Harper, B'jin didn't bother to add his own input, tired eyes catching Valerian's before focusing back on his dragon; his reassurances, now, were as much for himself.

Where Valerian had been greeted with affection after climbing over her, Erisi was greeted with an indignant hiss and a sharp Do you mind?! as if she were not blocking the only way into the room, and how else was the young man meant to get in. Of course, Valerian had had the good taste to let her know it was him (even if Larrikith hadn't bothered to actually check at the time. She knew Erisi did no such thing, because he was more embarrassed about getting passed her than he was about apologising for where he stuck his grimy mitts!

The green dragon shifted warningly when she picked up the spike of emotion coming off Talian and the two new arrivals, her gaze flashing with mild alarm as she altered her position, while B'jin tensed up, frowning up at the three young men, but not quite prepared to force his poor body into standing once more. The greenrider cuddled his dragon's head as Talian went over the events from the previous night. The boy was awful at story telling, B'jin decided. Not nearly enough lead up and emphasis on the drama of the situation. B'jin, however, had absolutely no desire to retell it in order to simply give the story the dramatic flair it deserved.

Just as B'jin was opening his mouth to say as much to the young healer, Valerian beat him to a response by whacking Talian upside the head. B'jin's open mouth remained open as shock washed over his features, followed by a streak of anger, then irritation when Larrikith gave a warble of amusement. I knew I liked that kid for a reason, Larrikith broad cast to the entire room, her voice light and amused. B'jin will squawk like a wherry and wave his arms around like a weyrling, but I don't think he could land a hit on the wall of the Harper Hall if he tried.

"I hit you all the time, and you're at least six times as wide as the Harper Hall." B'jin responded without missing a beat, shoving his dragon's head off his lap and watching with satisfaction as she knocked her jaw on the floor. "Oops." He said sarcastically, before grimacing comically as he stood and rubbed his abused thighs, not really paying much attention as Valerian picked up the conversation with Talian.

Hey! What about me? Larrikith demanded indignantly of Valerian. She wasn't usually one to demand compliments, but she had played her part in the night before, and was rather proud of herself. Do you know how long it took me to wake him? She cast an irritated look at B'jin, who simply shrugged.

"You're the one that wanted the full body massage before bed, love, so don't blame me. Besides, I am going to be murdered by D'ren after the scene you made last night. We're already in the shit heap after you searched poor sharding Tal in the first place without checking his rank, and then you flew out of schedule and caused a huge scene and to top it all off, last night you turned half the Weyr into a sharding ball court with your tossing everyone around!" B'jin was raving at his dragon, throwing his arms around as he did so and jabbing his finger in her nose at intervals. His voice was several octaves higher than it should be as he finished his little rant; "Do you have any idea how dead I am?"

See? Larrikith said, totally ignoring B'jin, her eyes alight with amusement. Screeching like a wherry, and waving his arms around like a Weyrling. Pathetic, isn't it? B'jin paused for a moment, before he landed a heavy, bare footed kick in the side of Larrikith's neck. "OUT!" he roared, and the dragon vanished between from right there on the floor. Her laughter, however, was left echoing in the minds of all four men. B'jin rubbed his temples in exasperation.

Turning back to the two harpers and the healer, B'jin's expression was bland, though a smile lingered on the corner of his lips. Whether his previous anger had been played up, or he was really just that eccentric wasn't really determinable. "That dragon, is going to be the death of me." Unfortunately, that was a literal statement. As much as B'jin would rant and rave about her, he would never dare dream of actually living without her. When between called her, there would be nothing she could do to keep him from going along for the ride. In any case, B'jin turned to look at Erisi with a mild frown. "Don't hit him more than once, if you can avoid it. Poke him in the guts, maybe. Those are tender. It'll hurt without actually doing any damage. I think." He winked at Talian, indicating he was teasing, before making his way across the room to him.

"I really do have to go and see how much trouble that stupid dragon as got me in." Brushing Talian's hair back with one hand, he kissed the healer's forehead, totally ignorant of any embarrassment (or perhaps simply not caring) it might cause the young man. "Assuming the Weyrleader allows me to live, I'll be back later." His tone was dry, and more than a little worried. "Have fun, boys. Don't beat him up too much, please. Last night was exhausting and I don't want a repeat." Tossing a wink at Valerian and a small smile to Erisi, B'jin made his way out the door, but stopped in the frame. He looked back at Talian with a grimace.

"... You probably don't want to come out of there until after the mess Tornado Larri made of your Hall is cleaned up." Grinning impishly, B'jin ducked out the door and down the hall.

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 500 Posts!PA - 750 Posts!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

V'ler
of Blue Veeth

Date of Birth
21.08.707, 37
Height
5’10
Eyes
Green
Build
Average
Hair
Brown, shaggy

Threads
19
Posts
429

Written By: SunsetWay
#11
Valerian offered a small smile to Talian. He still didn't like the method the healer had used to come to terms with his lot in life and finding the will to carry on but he was glad the man actually had that will now. He didn't have a chance to reply to any further, however, as two things happened; he followed Talian's gaze to where Erisi stood frozen with an odd expression while B'jin and Larrikith started bickering and making the whole room seem to burst into chaos. That seemed about the norm for those two and Valerian sighed and rolled his eyes at their antics. He suspected it was largely played up to keep the tension in the room low and give them all a smile after the extreme drama they were dealing with.

He kept his gaze locked on Erisi, trying to figure out what the man was thinking though a quick glance was sent to the dragon looking for compliments, which Valerian felt he could give but only if Larrikith knew she owed some as well. "Thank you for your role in things as well, Larrikith." But just so you know, I was the first one there looking after you after you passed out and I made sure they didn't harm you while you slept. I also spoke to you all night to reassure you and keep you company, you green lump of snark. Valerian sent the admission in thought toward Larrikith despite never caring what people thought of him but he had already revealed too much of himself and the feelings he actually did possess that showing he cared for a dragon was just something that could be skipped that day.

Once the dragon and flailing rider had left the room, Valerian jumped to his feet, no doubt freaking Talian out with the idea that he had changed his mind and was bolting on their friendship. While he wasn't abandoning the healer, there was another friendship he felt was close to breaking. Erisi was a man that talked big and loud but he didn't care much for confrontations, that much Valerian had learned in their short time of knowing each other. True they both enjoyed verbally laying into idiots but too much drama was simply something they both could do without and the way Erisi hadn't moved or said anything told Valerian a lot. His friend was shutting down and if he didn't want to process what was going on then there was a high chance that his fellow harper was about to run and never look back.

Crossing the room in several long and quick strides, Valerian grabbed Erisi's wrist, looking him in the eye and whispered so Talian couldn't hear him, "don't do it, Erisi. Neither of you will be happy if you leave without saying a word and pretending nothing happened." Without waiting for a reply whether in a verbal protest or an angry glare, Valerian tugged on the wrist and dragged his harper friend to the bedside of their healer friend.

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

Pronouns
Discord
{hidden}

Threads
33
Posts
364 & 3,342 IC

Written By: ZZZ Archived
#12
He hard Larrikith's sharp words resounding through the boundaries of his mind, but he didn't register them. Erisi was trapped in a moment where he had no idea what to do, confront Talian for his actions or sever him completely from his life. Talian had tried to end himself, and Erisi didn't even particularly mind whatever selfishness could be gleamed from that act. What he cared about was that he had put himself in a position to be hurt, and he was hurting. There was a vulnerable emotion rolling through him that he did not care for, the feeling that if Talian was lost he'd lose a valuable piece of his new life. Talian was a friend, perhaps with some benefits, but nothing more than that. The truth was that friendship was so hard for Erisi to find, and he hadn't ever been made to lose one in such a dramatic way as Talian had attempted. He had so little friends now that he valued people like Valerian and Talian even more.

Erisi had been hurt a lot, and he wasn't willing to put himself through any more pain. Talian obviously was only going to cause pain. The Healer claimed that this somehow made him stronger, but Erisi couldn't believe it. He didn't want to risk it. Surely, Valerian smacking Talian would have deemed some sort of response from Erisi, but he only watched the act through distant eyes. He should have risen to Talian's defense, or backed up Valerian's actions. He did neither, and when B'jin spoke his gaze only cut to the greenrider briefly. His decision was becoming more and more clear to him. Erisi couldn't tangle himself up in someone that would only bring him more grief. He held out long enough to witness B'jin leaving, taking that as his own cue to take off.

He should say something.

He shouldn't leave Talian in the dust as if the man did not matter, especially considering what Talian had almost done to himself.

There was a hardness in his eyes, a front to hide the whirl of emotions he was experiencing. He knew what he had to do, and while it would hurt now, it would save him from such a greater pain in the future. Erisi was not ready to lose anyone, especially someone he had valued as much of Talian. It was better to end things now and build bonds elsewhere than drag himself through the mud and grime with Talian. His choice was the easy one, a choice he'd always make when it came to his emotions. He turned his head to the side, gaze looking back to the door. When he turned back around, Valerian was suddenly in front of him. Momentarily disoriented, he eyed Valerian with confusion. Erisi had been pretty sharding sure that the man was just at Talian's side, too busy with scolding him to even pay mind to Erisi's own mood.

"I can't," he answered with a soft, sore voice. What he was saying 'I can't' to would remain a mystery. He knew what he was saying, though - that he couldn't cope with remaining as Talian's friend. He pulled his arm back as Valerian reached out to grab his writ, and the chance that it would turn into a fight was there. Erisi didn't want to budge, but he didn't exactly want to fight Valerian.

So, he found himself at Talian's bedside, looking down at the man through cold blue eyes. "I'm glad you're okay." His voice was nearly monotone - the young Harper was trying to distance himself. But, even as he stood beside Talian, there was a crack in his facade. The torrent of grief and relief broke through in a slight quiver of his lip, a softening of his eyes. Perhaps that was why he did not say more. He was scared that his composure would break if he kept talking.

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

Pronouns
Discord
{hidden}

Threads
31
Posts
579 & 3,342 IC

Written By: ZZZ Archived
#13
Talian inhaled deeply as he watched Eri approach, the healer's eyes locked forlornly on his friend's haunted, hollow expression. Talian couldn't bring himself to look away, though he knew he wanted to rather badly. It was one thing to hurt himself. It was much harder to be confronted with just how badly he'd hurt the people he'd chosen to stay for. He frowned, eyes widening and welling up with stoic tears as he regarded his friend.

"You mean a lot to me, Eri," Talian said in a shallow, morose tone. His expression's urgency heightened to a sort of pleading before he finally closed his eyes and wiped a tear away. "You're one of the reasons I regret my actions. I understand if you can't forgive me, though..." he said, almost sounding like he was in a daze, as if he'd been hit in the gut. He drew up slightly where he sat, muscles tensing up. He opened his eyes, be it took him a few hesitant moments before her actually met Eri's gaze again.

He saw the pain there. He also saw some sort of facade, though he didn't know what exactly laid behind it. He swallowed hard, refusing to allow a knot to form in his throat. "Either way, I'll always be thankful for you. You're the first person to ever defend me...and you're the first person I ever felt comfortable taking about...her with," he said. He glanced briefly to Valerian, a promise to inform the other harper of all the details soon.

"I wish I could say something more meaningful," he said in a strained voice. "But I'm no harper...I...I don't know the w-words for it..." he said, voice quivering slightly. He looked away suddenly, too scared to face Eri, afraid that in the blink of an eye their friendship would be over. He clutched his bedsheets until his knuckles turned white, much as he had during their first awkward encounter. Fear.

"I don't know what I'd do without you, though."

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 500 Posts!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

Pronouns
Discord
{hidden}

Threads
33
Posts
364 & 3,342 IC

Written By: ZZZ Archived
#14
It was hard to say and do nothing in response to Talian's words. Erisi almost pulled it off, though. His mind had come to the conclusion that the best option for him was to distance himself from the Healer. All he had to do was get through this conversation without his composure cracking, or Valerian cracking down on him, and Erisi would never again be put in a situation where he was hurt like this. So he tried to stand stoic, tried to hold in the wealth of emotions pounding against his skull. Erisi was not an emotional person, but this had cut him a little too deeply.

Not once had he thought that Talian was so sad as to try and take his own life. The idea had never came to him. Talian had been depressed, sure, but Erisi had thought 'surely not that much!' It stung, to know that his friendship wasn't enough to keep Talian holding on to life. He had thought that they were making progress. Talian had been open with him, they had shared their grievances between one another. Wasn't that a sign of recovery? So, then why did Talian even try to end his life if things were beginning to mend?

He was trying to force Talian's words straight through one ear and out the other. He could hear the emotion in his friend's voice, even the defeat. It was heartbreaking if he allowed himself to dwell on it, so he didn't. The quiet after Talian's words spoke more than if Erisi had actually used words. There was a certain amount of tension radiating off the Harper. He was desperately resisting doing what he wanted to do - for his own sake. Talian could certainly survive one way or another without him. But he certainly could not do well with the Healer.

Blue eyes glanced back over to Valerian, almost accusing in their stare. Why did his friend have to intervene? What, really, did Valerian know about his friendship with Talian? He certainly could not know them both well enough if he wanted their friendship to remain intact. Erisi was not up for making himself vulnerable again, and he was already feeling that way now. Perhaps, it was just time to be blunt with the feelings he had been ignoring. Valerian would probably find something wrong with his response to Talian, but it was obviously what both of his friends were waiting for. A response. Any response.

"I didn't think you'd ever do it." His voice was unreasonably firm to hold back his grief. "I thought you were doing better, all things considered. So, this isn't good. Not for me. I hate this place enough that I cannot lose the only people I value, and I sharding will stop valuing you if you're going to continue hurting me!" His composure had broken a little bit, the most natural emotion rising to the surface - anger.

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

Pronouns
Discord
{hidden}

Threads
31
Posts
579 & 3,342 IC

Written By: ZZZ Archived
#15
Talian's timid eyes saw the cracks, but he wasn't sure what exactly he saw beneath them until Erisi fially, at long last, spoke. His words were grating and cruel on the healer's ears, sending Talian's pronounced emotional side into a panicked, whirling frenzy. Not only was he about to lose his best friend - one of the first friends he'd ever truly had - but he was going to be told off in the process!

If anything, this made Tal feel even worse. He briefly wondered if staying had been worth it, but the thought never really took firm hold. Even in this situation, or a hypothetical one in which everyone abandoned him, did he think he could gather up the moxie to take poison again. Or drop between. Or anything.

So he just sad there, eyes widening and lips becoming thin and downturned in stressful anticipation. He took one small comfort in Erisi's words, though; they revealed that, in spite of everything, Erisi cared for him.

"I don't know how else to apologize," he said softly, his voice still quivering like an insect stuck in a gossamer spinner's web. "I couldn't even stand getting out of bed in the morning. I- Shards. The only time I'-m ever happy is when I'm with you two, or B'jin..." he said, his own sad emotions draining from his voice in favor of a sort of void.

"Valerian is right," he said softly, his seriousness revealed in his usage of Val's full name. He supposed he owned that explanation to Val one day as well. "...We're stuck here together. I'm sorry I forgot that. I don't think any of us should forget that now. I...I couldn't think. It's like I was dead on my feet , all the time..." he said. He frowned and started clutching at the bedsheets again in effort to keep an outburst at bay.

"I don't know what else to say Eri, other than I promise to never hurt you again. I don't suppose you have to believe me. But...if you want to leave, I won't stop you..."

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 500 Posts!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

V'ler
of Blue Veeth

Date of Birth
21.08.707, 37
Height
5’10
Eyes
Green
Build
Average
Hair
Brown, shaggy

Threads
19
Posts
429

Written By: SunsetWay
#16
Valerian was, as usual, in the middle. For the most part he was generally content with being neutral or indifferent about everything that came his way and forming a stance on something without emotions clouding his decision but then there were the rare moments where he wished he was different. If he were ruled by emotions or had a far more fiery soul than perhaps he would want to do more than sigh at the bickering, call them both selfish brats, and leave to find food for his rumbling stomach. As it was, he gave into the urge to sigh but substituted the rest with a hand running through his hair, massaging at his scalp while green eyes took in Talian and then Erisi. He had no idea how deep their friendship was and couldn't say if they were more than just friends but Valerian could see the pain they were both in because of actions and words.

Normally he wouldn't care if intervening was expected or wanted as he would say what he wanted, when he wanted, and Valerian didn't see a problem with that trait. Now, however, he was struck with an urge to meander over to the window and inspect the going-ons out there and give his friends some privacy while still staying close enough in case they needed him for whatever reason. Unfortunately for them, while he had no problem with fading into the background and observing the situation and people, Valerian felt compelled to add his two cents yet again and play counselor, which would have made his masters proud for finally attempting to be diplomatic.

He couldn't fathom how deeply hurt Erisi was but given what he had felt during Talian's recount, Valerian imagined he could multiply that by twenty and have a better concept of his friend's pain. He also had a feeling that anything he said would upset Erisi further. "I already stopped you once so if you want to walk out now and end your friendship with Talian because you can't handle an emotion deeper than lust or euphoric bliss, then you can go. But you know what, this is new to me as well and a little strange but it happened and we need to deal with it. Talian learned he wants to live partly because of us, because of you, I learned I can be stirred to interesting emotions and long pep talks because of you both, and you learned you finally opened up enough to be hurt by people you count as friends. From what I hear, that's a real friendship."

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

Pronouns
Discord
{hidden}

Threads
33
Posts
364 & 3,342 IC

Written By: ZZZ Archived
#17
He had no idea what to say. Here Talian was pouring his heart out to him, revealing every emotion with not only words, but expressions and gestures. All Erisi could do in response was stare back at the Healer. He had always been an expert at keeping his true emotions at bay. Erisi could easily resort to a caustic tone or even anger, which were far easier things to deal with in comparison to the depth of feelings he was experiencing now. Erisi did not open up, because he did not like leaving himself wide open for hurt to stab right through his chest. The Harper was a closed off individual, even his friends knew that. It was nearly impossible for strangers to crack through his exterior unless he was physically interested in them, and even then he only showed enough of himself to get what it was that he wanted.

So, it was far easier for him to respond to Valerian. He could and would use the other Harper as a means of escape from more... vulnerable emotions. His eyes flashed to Valerian, colder than they naturally were. "If that's all you think of me, then why expect anything more?" he answered dryly. Valerian's words should have inspired something in him, and they did, but Erisi wasn't ready to come around. He probably would not fully come around for a while yet. He was the sort of person that held on to things, grudges and grievances alike. Erisi wouldn't forget that Talian had tried to kill himself, and he wouldn't forget how that made him feel, and how uncomfortable he was to finally feel that way.

He really shouldn't be snapping at Valerian, who as far as he saw things had done little wrong. Erisi should be biting Talian's head off for hurting him, but he couldn't quite bring himself around to confront his own feelings to do that. When it came to Talian, he was obviously evasive, obviously struggling with himself. He wanted to remain friends with Talian, but he also wanted to never have to feel what he was feeling now. If this was what such a friendship brought him, he wasn't sure he wanted it. Sucking in a short breath, his gaze carefully rested on his distraught friend. He was likely stressing Talian out far more because of his own behavior. How close was Talian to the edge? Would it really take that much now for Talian to decide that his life wasn't worth it?

"I... don't know," he admitted at length, for a moment hiding his face in his hands to obscure the stress and indecision written upon it. "You've been a great friend, and you've helped me through some rough spots." So why wasn't Erisi returning the favor? "I just haven't known what it's like to lose someone I care about, and this cut it awfully close, and I feel like shit because of it."

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

Pronouns
Discord
{hidden}

Threads
31
Posts
579 & 3,342 IC

Written By: ZZZ Archived
#18
Tal turned his head away, no longer able to stand the look in Erisi's eyes. He heard Val's kind words, which served to relieve a bit of his tension and slow his unsteady heartbeat, but they didn't clear him of all his anxiety. He still felt as if he hung over a firepit by a mere thread, threatening to topple into it at any time.

Unfortunately, while he'd surprised the incident, he was far from well. He imagined he would be sick for at least two or three days, and as he sat in rigid anticipation of Erisi's verdict, his body decided to remind him. He clutched his stomach and wrenched forward a bit, startled by the sudden wave of nausea that ran over him. Sweat popped up on his brow as he realized just how precarious his situation was. He sick, pessimistic, emotional, and well...delicate. So soon after brushing against his own death, the outright rejection was causing what he termed in his head as a violent stress reaction.

He set his jaw and concentrated on keeping the bile in his stomach (for he didn't have anything else to vomit). How horrible, to be rejected like this when he knew for a fact that if Eri was the suicidal one, he'd be kneeling at his bed late into the night! Tal looked away in shame and bitterness, but also embarrassment. He figured throwing up on Eri would be the worst thing for him to do.

He heaved for a moment, but managed to settle it soon enough. He groaned and hoped to Faranth that neither of them had noticed. He hated feeling this puny already. He wanted to lash out at Erisi, to point out that Eri was just as selfish for expecting - no demanding friends who would never hurt him. For running at the first sign of danger. But Tal just didn't have it in him. He barely  managed to talk himself out of just giving up entirely. Eri was worth a fight.

Of couse, Tal's version of 'fight' was different from most.

"Eri..." he coughed, cautiously turning around. "Please? I would do it for you," was all he said, unable to think of anything else. Even so, his pessimistic side quickly took over as he sank low in his bed, fully anticipating a violent rejection.

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 500 Posts!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

Pronouns
Discord
{hidden}

Threads
33
Posts
364 & 3,342 IC

Written By: ZZZ Archived
#19
Discomfort reflected upon his face as Talian fought and conquered a wave of sickness. He was by no means so cruel as to feel nothing for his friend's plight. Rather, it was the opposite, that he felt so much that he likewise felt the need to hide it. He flinched when Talian coughed, holding his peace until the Healer had regained his composure. Talian's appearance made it very clear what the Healer had put himself through the previous night. Whatever he had done to himself, he was still fighting the effects of. If nothing else, it made Erisi slightly more sympathetic. He cared about Talian, really. He was just horrible at showing how much he cared.

He was at a crossroads again. Erisi had no idea if he should turn away from Talian or give this friendship another chance. He didn't want to do this out of pity, because he was sure that would lead to himself getting hurt again. So, the fact that Talian had tried to kill himself needed to be dismissed. Without that, though, Erisi enjoyed his time with Talian. He valued their friendship, the ability they had to seek comfort from one another, since no one else seemed to understand their plight as well as the other. Truthfully, the only reason he was so upset was because he had come so close to losing one of the only friends he had, and certainly his closest.

Erisi sighed again, an action that he had done so much now that it was weighted by grief. Fingers teased through the dark strands of his hair, blue eyes fixed on the floor rather that the defeated expression on Talian's face. "I'm not going to leave you," he said at last, giving into his own desire to keep Talian by his side. But, just because he said and felt the words did not mean that things would magically revert to how they were. It'd take time. Erisi had been hurt, and he wasn't going to let the memory of this particular pain go so soon. It was a reminder for him of what friendship could be like, and that was why he only had a few friends, and why he cared about them all the much more.

"I promise, Tal. I'm not so much of a wherry to call it quits over something like this." He had been about to, and probably would have if Valerian hadn't intervened. He wasn't quite ready to thank his other friend for that interference yet. He wasn't sure if being friends with Talian was good or bad. It just felt good.

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

Pronouns
Discord
{hidden}

Threads
31
Posts
579 & 3,342 IC

Written By: ZZZ Archived
#20
"I know I hurt you," Tal said, sputtering a bit as another surge of coughing rose up in his chest. He angled his face towards Erisi just a little bit. "But you hurt me sometimes, too. And I don't care. You're m-my friend, and you're worth it," he said. He sniffled a bit, still struggling to keep his composure. "I wouldn't trade anyone in the world for you, Eri...no matter how poorly you think of me."

He was a clever boy, but also highly dramatic. He really felt denounced, though Erisi's last few words restored a bit of hope in him. He rubbed his eyes and turned his head back to his friends. "Thank you guys. I couldn't ask for any better friends,  I don't imagine.." His eyes gleamed a bit as he thought back on the previous night, to the very moment where the realization hit him. He couldn't leave them behind. He couldn't! As he sat now, he couldn't bear to think about it, how he'd come to very close.

He cleared his throat a bit, wincing in pain as he did so, and slid back under his covers, trying to find a comfortable arrangement. "I still hate this place," he whispered softly, managing the weakest little laugh. "I know you guys do, too. I guess it's not so bad when we have each other to hate it with." He coughed a little bit and smirked at his own sappiness. It felt good, even if such openness was making his friends uncomfortable. "...But this is something I need to put behind me," he said. There was some resolve there, buried deep...but quite honest.

"You guys don't have to stay here with me if you don't want," he added in a mellow tone. "I'll be fine on my own. Not that I don't like having someone to talk to," he said, implying that he very much hoped they would stay.

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 500 Posts!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!

Pronouns
Discord
{hidden}

Threads
33
Posts
364 & 3,342 IC

Written By: ZZZ Archived
#21
Normally Erisi would have reacted poorly to Talian calling him out like he did, but the Harper was feeling particularly subdued over the day's events. And really, the day had hardly even begun. So, when Talian mentioned that Erisi had hurt him too, he accepted the words just barely. If he thought about it too hard then he really would get ticked off, and now wasn't the time for him to scream at Talian over nuances. Perhaps Talian even managed to soothe Erisi's natural anger with commenting on how he was irreplaceable. "I don't think poorly of you," he stressed to his friend. "You've been there for me plenty of times, and that's what counts. Not that you made this... mistake once." It was still a big deal, but Erisi would contemplate on that later.

Erisi finally relented enough to sit down in a chair next to Talian's bed. The rigidity of his posture drained away, and his body leaned forward in an unnatural slouch. Erisi had always been a little too proper in public to be seen slouching, so he very clearly did not care and was a little emotionally drained. It was clear, without Talian having to ask, that Erisi would stick around for a while. He may not have much to say, but he would be there for his friend now that he had made the commitment. If he had chosen to run, he wouldn't have had second thoughts about it. Instead, he had chosen to stay, but just like his other option, he would not have second thoughts unless Talian did something serious to stir them.

"This Weyr is really wrong, ignoring it isn't going to make it change. I have to live here, but that doesn't mean any of us have to accept that what's been done to us is okay." Now, however, was not the time to preach about how kidnapping Candidates was sickeningly wrong. They had plenty of time to whine and moan about how Katila Weyr operated. Right now was the time to focus on Talian's health, and see to it that he got well with the comfort of his friends surrounding him.

"I'm staying," he announced with an easy shrug of his shoulders. "It's not like my chores are really that necessary. I'm sure they don't want me touching clothes anyways."

PA - 100 PostsPA - 250 Posts!!PA - 50 Posts!PA - First Post!


Activity
Reading: 1 Guest(s)



Forum Jump:



Affiliates

Credits