Insomnia [Open]

Casa was normally a sound sleeper, but her head had been filled with many new thoughts and feelings as of late. Her mind wandered from the Hatching to the many adventures and plans with Quenym. Feelings of happiness welled up inside her when she thought of Quenym. There were also the thoughts of uncertainty and fear that rang through her dreams now that she had been convinced to Stand. Soon she would Stand, and she had begun to peek into classes to see what they were learning.

All this change was well and good, but it caused her to toss and turn at night, and her dreams became confusing and muddled. This often led to her waking up in the middle of the night or not being able to sleep at all. Tonight was no different; as soon as she had laid down, her body felt like it was restless and buzzing with energy, while her mind felt fuzzy and exhausted. She had laid there for a couple of hours before deciding she simply wouldn't be able to sleep.

Getting up, she stretched, wincing at the tightness along her shoulders and down her back. She had been hitting the physical labor extra hard, trying to tire herself out. Regardless, it hadn't helped any. She decided the best thing for relaxation would be a bath and some of the good wine that she had managed to sneak out while cooking. Grabbing the skin from under her mattress along with a towel, she padded quietly down the halls towards the bathing houses.

Upon arrival, she found one of the smaller rooms, completely unoccupied. Smiling softly, she turned the water on, the steam rising into the air as it began to fill. This time of night, there weren't many folks around, so she closed the door only most of the way. She slipped out of her clothes and folded them neatly near the wall, grabbing soap sand and setting it by her towel and the skin of wine. She took a deep sip from the skin of wine and then slid into the pool up to her neck, letting her now-growing hair float loosely in the water as she enjoyed the ridiculously hot water begin to ease knots and aches all over.

It was one of those nights when, no matter how much she tried, Arddra couldn't get to sleep. Frustrated and not wanting to just hang out in her room hoping to sleep, she decided to soak in a bath. Worse comes to worse she will be clean and relaxed for the day. What she hoped was it will make her sleepy enough she could fall asleep.

Given the late hour Arddra was positive nobody will be using the bath house. Putting on her bathrobe over her sleeping gown, Arddra gathered up her toiletries and headed to the bath house.

When she entered the bathhouse she definitely thought somebody was here, it just seemed more steamy in here that she expected. Pushing open a door of a room she assumed as unoccupied due to the door not being closed and latched, Arddra gave a startled sound when she noticed somebody else in the water.

"Oh I am sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt. Is that you Casa?" Arddra smiled, recognizing the younger candidate. "I can leave you to bathe alone if you prefer,  but this tub is big enough for two if you don't mind company."

Arddra didn't mind bathing alone but having the young woman with her will give her somebody to talk to. It will also hopefully discourage any men from showing up and thinking they can get cozy to her. Arddra still considered herself married so had kept her distance as much as she was able to, from the menfolk. That and the fact she didn't trust the dragonriders, especially the cute ones. There were too many cute dragonriders around.

As she lie there, she thought she heard footsteps shuffling quietly in the hallway. Glancing up lazily, she saw someone poke their head into the room. The sound of Arddra's voice confirmed the presence of another, and Casa languidly waved her in. Company was as welcome as anything else, and it was another girl, not one of the many men around the Weyr, and not one of the froofy ones.

"Course there's room for two. I'd be a hog to take up the whole tub, and the water's freshly pumped into the room, still hot enough to scald your skin right off." As she lie in the water, a concerned squeak came from above her. Peering up, Knack had popped in and sat on a high shelf, looking down at her owlishly. She giggled and clicked, and he winged down lightly, landing on the edge of the tub and bobbing to Arddra before curling up on the edge, one paw on her shoulder. His eyes slid shut as he trilled in enjoyment.

"Hope you don't mind...Knack doesn't like to be left alone, even when there is a whole bed full of furs to nestle in." She left her thoughts drift to the other two, who responded sleepily, flashing her a picture of being wound around one another. "It'll be just him, Kaylee and Edge are contently asleep and have no interest in bathtime for now." She stroked his head as the other girl climbed into the tub. "Couldn't sleep either?"

Arddra slipped fully into the room and quickly laid her things close to the tub edge so she can reach them easy once in the tub. Turning away slightly she slipped off her robe and hung it on the nearby hook. She then pulled off her nightgown and under things before slipping into the hot water.

"Oh this is so nice. It is amazing how the water is heated so effectively and circulated," Arppra knew it was all dumped out in the back where it was pretty much a muggy quagmire now. A proper drainage ditch would eventually be needed but she didn't really want to be given the chore of making one. One reason she had not suggested it to anybody.

When sh heard a squeak she looked over to see a firelizard on a high shelf looking at them. It seemed all her friends were getting firelizards now, Arppra really should get one of her own. They probably be helpful in finding things too, everything she heard about the amazing miniature dragons pointed out they are quite clever, especially if trained well.

"I don't mind at all, he can join us in the bath if he likes," Arddra took a handful of soap sand and washed herself quickly, sitting so the foaming water from her scrubbing didn't flow towards Casa. No point getting the other girl all sudsy. "How many of them do you have?"

Casa watched the other girl wash herself quickly, not minding the bubbles as they flowed around the tub. She had taken a bath earlier in the night before bed, as she hated going to bed dirty, and now was just for relaxing. But she could appreciate taking advantage of the tub while it was there. Knack watched in fascination, tilting his head down to nose a bubble and blinking slowly when it popped. She chuckled and rubbed his head gently.

"I've three myself." She wrinkled her nose at the number - she sounded like a hoarder. Shaking her head, she rushed to continue. "I found a clutch of em, but almost no one came...we all ended up with at least one, I ended up with three. Flora and K'ton each got one, and my best friend Quenym Impressed two himself." She stroked Knack's head before gently plopping him into the tub.

He gave a single low chirp of surprise, but immediately fanned his little wings out, paddling around her. She watched fondly. "Besides Knack, I've a Blue named Edge and a Green named Kaylee. They are pretty much inseparable however, and -" she paused here, sending another thought of interest and getting nothing but sleep in return, "-currently asleep in my furs, taking up the whole bed." Her voice colored with amusement. "They are useful little creatures though, and I love them something fierce. If you ever one want, I will gladly help you look for one." Knack turned to look at the woman, ducking his head in the water and bobbing his head agreeably.

Arddra chuckled when the little fire lizard blinked at a bursting bubble. They were certainly adorable/ "Having three is quite impressive, a good thing you did share it with anybody who was around when they hatched. So that was where Quenym Impressed his. He is a nice boy, I have helped him learn to cook a pie not too long ago. Do you know how to cook? I am sure he would love learning from you too if he's your best friend."

When Casa plopped the little bronze into the bath water Arddra inhaled, worried the sudden drop in the water would harm it. Fortunately he didn't seem at all phased after the initial startled chirp and he was paddling about happily. Arddra smiled.

"Knack, Edge and Kaylee, interesting names. Any reason why you picked those particular names?" she asked curiously, sinking down into the water now that she finished rinsing off the soap. Her hair she had cleaned the day before so she didn't feel a need to do it again now. "Just this little guy joining us both in our inability to fall asleep."

"Oh I would definitely like one and as soon as I have time to go look for a clutch, I will make sure you come along too. Quenym too if he wants to come along, or any of your other friends. If we end up finding a whole clutch, I certainly don't want the entire thing for myself." It occurred to Arddra she could barter the eggs for many things, not everybody would have time to search for wild clutches or want to wait till a Impressed queen laid a clutch. Not that she had time to scour all the beaches to hoard eggs to barter with. A few would be worth it if she did find a large clutch. Arddra didn't want more than one or two firelizards tops and a large clutch would spread far.

"Yes I find you very adorable," Arddra smiled, looking down at the fire lizard as it bobbed his head. She flicked some water at it playfully, curious if it would chase after the droplets or splash her back.

"Quenym would be a good helper for finding eggs too - he got two from the same clutch mine did, greens named Lady and Sassy. I would be GLAD to help you look! I even know some awesome little hidey holes." She stretched out languidly, thinking back to finding the eggs and the joy that had ensued. That had been with Ryvian...he was a sweet boy, if a bit adult for her tastes. Shaking her head to clear her mind, she nodded an agreement to her cooking skills.

As she responded, the little brown chirped an inquisitive permission to join Arddra. Casa shrugged agreeably, and he dipped under the water to lightly, almost shyly, splash her back with the water. He then creeled and twirled around, floating lazily next to her arm. Casa smiled at him lovingly. "Kaylee seemed like a sweet, feminine name for the little green. Edge was born right next to her, and was constantly on the edge where Kaylee pushed him around when they hatched."

"As for Knack...well, he shows all the best signs of a brown. Mellow, companionable, and he lives up to his name. He has a knack for finding things or being where he is most needed. I love that about him. He's very much a people type, he doesn't like being left alone at all." He stretched out his wings in the water, blinking sweetly up at Arddra as he projected his itching back and how nice it would be if the girl would give him a scritch?

"Given how many fire lizards are around I don't think it will be all that difficult to find a clutch. I just don't know if I am ready to have a fire lizard yet. When I do decide to go looking for some I will definitely ask you and Quenym to help. We can pick a nice day some endweek so we don't have to worry about chores."

Arddra smiled as Knack flicked water towards her with his wings then floated towards her and projected the sensation his back was itchy. Giving a soft laugh, Arddra moved her hand under water and since the little fire lizard was floating on his back she scratched his back from underneath.

"They are very sweet," Arddra admitted. "Far less work taking care of I expect, then a dragon. Good practice for a dragon too, just on a very small scale."

Turning her attention back to Knack, she continued to scratch his back, smiling as he crooned in delight.

The brown 'lizard soaked up the attention, snuggling closer to her in the water. Casa watched in mild amusement, glad to see Knack making other friends. She loved having him around her neck, but she did feel he needed interaction with other. Arddra seemed to be quite a hit, so she knew she might be able to convince the girl to help with feeding or oiling days, when the others were rowdy and excitable.

After a couple moments, she broken the silence with a question, hoping to get to know the other girl better. "So...what do you think of the Weyr? I know it can be an odd place, but there are some good people here, if you know where to look." Her voice was colored with a hint of amusement, a hint of warning.

She wondered if Arddra was one of those from the Trips North. She didn't talk about it often, as mentioning those trips was walking on egg shards enough. Not something you talked about casually or with ease. She certainly didn't recognize the girl very well, but she seemed fairly adjusted to Weyr life, especially if she had been Kidnapped. Knack hopped up on the ledge beside Arddra, tail curling around her wrist as he tilted his head at her, also curious for a story.

Arddra continued scratching the little brown, completely absorbed in the task till he chirped and moved up onto the ledge of the tub. As he still had his tail around her wrist, she resumed rubbing the soft hide and scratching around the eye ridge.

"It is very different from what I was raised to do,' Arddra responded knowing from past experience talking about her distrust of the dragonriders, especially with fellow candidates and weyrbrats was treading on dangerous ground. Leaning against the edge of the tub she decided to return to her old habits. Say as little as needed about herself. "I have some friends among the current and past candidates and for the most part I have adjusted to life here. I just hope I Impress a gold soon."

"What about yourself, Casa, are you hoping to get a gold?" Arddra decided to move the conversation away from her own feelings for now.

Casa was able to tell that Arddra was uncomfortable discussing things too in depth. She wasn't sure why, but each of the Taken had their reasons. She couldn't imagine being brought to a new place, with no warning, and just told to stay. To deal with it. It seemed pretty harsh, but she didn't have any say in the matter and that was that. All she could do was try to be friendly and helpful.

Still, Arddra offered up an answer, which was better than she got from the others. "Gold standing. That's good! I could see you on a gold - you've got an air of leadership to you, and you seem to be fair in general to all. I haven't seen you with many, granted, but I think you'd make a good goldrider."

She offered the other girl an easy smile, to let her know she wouldn't pry. She instead dove into the question she had offered, trying to keep conversation friendly. "I'm just starting to play with the idea of being a Candidate," she murmured. "Before I was content to watch from the Sands, but...Quenym and the other 'Brats want me to Stand." She shrugged. "I don't know if a Gold would want me. I'm curious and loud and opinionated."

"Thank you, it is very kind of you to say so," Arddra replied, liking this young girl. "To be honest I can be quite judgmental, I wasn't before but now, I don't trust too easily anymore. You and other fellow candidates yes, but I am very uneasy around dragonriders."

Arddra decide to come out about this fact just so Casa can understand why she avoids dragonriders as much as she can, when not in a group of candidates or the dinning hall.

"There may be curious, loud and opinionated gold dragons waiting to hatch for you to Impress. Or maybe a more calm and open minded gold will be just the thing to balance you."

Casa noticed the woman begin to relax, and she smiled encouragingly. Uneasy around dragonriders? She knew some of the men could be a little rough - especially post flight - so maybe that was it. She couldn't think of another reason why someone would be mean to Arddra. She was so nice!

And judgemental? Well...she didn't seem to act out on her judgements, at least in the time she'd known her. And sometimes being able to read someone or judge them on their actions might be useful, at least for a gold rider. It was how they kept the safety of the people they were supposed to lead. As long as she didn't act out, like Dae had heard some people did...she was completely confident this woman would do a good job in helping the Weyr.

Wrinkling her nose, she tilted her head back into the water and sighed with a grin. "Maybe. Most of the golds I've heard about aren't like that. Bossy. Or mean. Or too busy to be friendly. Some are prissy. But they are good for the Weyr." She popped a bubble and shrugged. "Who knows? Maybe I'll Impress a green. That'd be a sight."

"Weyrlife is still rather new to me, I only know what we were taught in the Candidate lessons and what I picked up over the last couple years. I was one of the last Northerners taken, from what I heard, before that horrid practice was stopped by D'ren's order. " Arddra sighed, closing her eyes. "I know many of us who were Taken were pleased, the chance to Impress a dragon overruled the shock and fear of being snatched and taken so far away from home."

"It must be very different to grow up in the Weyr, with dragons all around and knowing there will always be the chance to stand and Impress at a clutch." Arddra didn't want to give the impression she hated everything to do with the weyr, for that wasn't the case. "I was so frightened of the dragons when I was first brought here, now they are very impressive. Just the thought such a magneificant creature, is as smart as we are in their own way and you are bonded to them forever. Dragonriders must never feel alone."

"With so few dragons, all the golds are needed, no matter how the behave. Most of the female candidates who have Impressed golds were alright. I didn't get to know them really well but most seemed good sorts who I expect, will do the Weyr good. I just hope there aren't too many queens."

At Casa's suggestion she may Impress a green, Arddra frowned. From what she knew about Greenriders they mostly were men but a few have been women. Arddra would feel like she failed if she ended up with a Green...it was expected she would Impress a gold. Yet, despite her own feelings females are best with Golds, Casa seemed the sort who would do well on a green dragon.

"I think Impressing a green would suit your nature. I think you have enough of a rebellious streak to Impress a green just to annoy those who think women should never Impress any dragon other than gold."

Casa laughed loudly, her eyes sparkling. "Oh, yes. I would be quite happy with a Gold, mind you - its what is expected of me and all that. But a Green...yes, that would be quite the surprise for many." She sighed and rolled her eyes, snuggling back in the warm water up to her shoulders. "Many men think women are too delicate, too soft to ride a chromatic dragon - that only Golds will do. I know Golds are important, but some of us girls could totally work out on a green or blue! We're not all soft!"

She paused, looking Arddra over. "Not that your too soft or girly. I...erm." She paused, tongue tied. "You are a lady, but you are a good one. You don't seem all prissy and whiny." She hoped that came across as a compliment, cringing at her inability to really get her point across in a more sensible way. "I like you anyway," she added lamely to the end.

"As for growing up in the Weyr...well, you get used to dragons very fast, that is true." It was next to impossible not to get used to them. Flights, Wing practices, Hatchings - they were everywhere, and it was simply part of life. She felt sympathetic to the poor woman, having been snatched up and carried away. No wonder she didn't seem to like it here too much. Casa made it her task to be as friendly as possible to the woman and make her feel more at home.

"I bet you'll Impress a Gold. And you'll never have to be alone then. And you'll feel at home and happy and welcome." She nodded reassuringly, and Knack chirruped an echo of content and welcome, rubbing his little head against her arm affectionately.

"I don't think it's a matter of some women being delicate, but because of children." Here Arddra knew she failed miserable. "Not that most common women who work hard in the smaller holds or just don't come from privilege don't manage to have children and still to labor. I think men, especially dragonriders just want women to be weak so they can't be challenged by them. Even goldriders don't do much..supposedly they did fight Thread with flamethrowers but if Thread never returns, I doubt we would even be trained in it and just kept in bed to make babies."

"I hope we both get the dragon we want and need and sooner rather than later." Arddra quickly moved away from the topic of babies. She failed to even get pregnant after nearly three years of marriage and her husband certainly didn't fail in his duty to wife. He shared her bed every night save the nights of her flow. He didn't like laying with her during that time and Arddra didn't mind. She did wish he would still sleep in the same bed, having his warm body next to hers would have been welcome. How she missed Fosorcim, she truly did care for him even if he was an arranged marriage. In her heart she knew he was dead but when she was kidnapped he was alive..but very sick.

Knack's chirp of welcome drew he away from her sad recollections and reminded her of what Casa said. Arddra knew for her own sanity and to find any kind of happiness she had to embrace her new life here. There was likely nothing for her in the North anymore but she still wanted to know for certain. Taking a deep breath and resumed stroking the little fire lizard's soft hide then looked over at Casa.

"I like you Casa, I hope we can become good friends. I probably take awhile to really open up but I have a feeling we will be loyal friends. I have been here for three years, Katila is starting to feel more like a place of great potential. Impressing a dragon will make it home, I am sure."

She beamed in delight - good friends! She could never have enough good friends. She wanted to make sure the woman felt absolutely at home, and resolved to find reasons to make her smile. She really was a sweet woman, if nervous. And who could blame her? Those taken from up North had a brutal introduction to the Weyr.

"I have the utmost belief that if anyone here can Impress, it'll be you." She smiled, her eyes lighting up. She couldn't believe how many truly friendly people there were in the Weyr, and how lucky she was to have them. She wanted to make Arddra really feel at home, and maybe over time help introduce her to the good dragonriders, the ones who wouldn't hurt her. That would be important, if she were to become a rider - she'd have to deal with them all the time, and shouldn't have to be afraid of them.

"I'm glad this place is starting to feel like home. I promise, it can be a good place. Just you wait until you meet Quenym. You'll like him too. Or Elisel. She's the good sort, who can make anyone feel at home with a hug and a cup of tea." She thoughtfully chewed on her lip, thinking about what sort of things she could do to make the woman happy. Maybe she and Quenym could make a necklace like the one she had made for Flora!

It was nice to see the young woman smile so brightly. Arddra liked to see happy people and missed the free spirited joy she had when she was Casa's age. Arddra had been happy with her life till about a year after she married Fosorcim. He was a good man too and somebody she had been in love with. What started to make things hard for her was her failure to conceive in not just their first year of marriage but well into their second year. Fosorcim was a good lover and they enjoyed sex nearly every night, there was no reason for her to fail to become pregnant. Save for one. Pushing these thoughts away she envied Casa's youthful joy. Arddra hoped nothing ever happened to dampen it like it did with her.

"Thank you so much Casa, it meals a lot to hear you say that," Arddra smiled. "I don't know what I will do with myself if I do end up aging out."

"Oh I have met Quenym, he's a good young man. I gave him some pointers on how to cook pie. He wanted to learn how to be self sufficient, including knowing how to cook for himself. Unfortunately his initial assumptions about making pie were a bit off but I was glad to help him out." Arddra thought he and Casa would make a very cute couple but decided not to say it. Casa may not be old enough yet to see more into her friendship with the boy than just that, friendship. Arddra knew it could be just that anyway.

"I will love to meet your friend Elisel, I don't mind meeting new people." Arddra added.