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+---- Thread: [D] Dragonhealer's Notebook (/showthread.php?tid=5205)
Dragonhealer's Notebook - L'gan - 20.May.22
[The journal is primarily a medical log, with notes about various injuries and ailments and what was done to fix them. But every now and then, some more personal entries slip in.]
10.08.742
Someone suggested we try writing to help process our grief. It’s never been something I preferred to do, but Bell called me out for working too hard last week. I don’t know what set me off this time, but it’s just been easier when I could just work and worry about others instead of my mate. The attacks stopped as mysteriously as they started but I can’t help a nagging feeling of something lurking.
At least Bell is smiling again some days.
RE: Dragonhealer's Notebook - L'gan - 20.May.22
02.09.742
She wants to try again but I’m worried. She’s getting stronger, and she’s seemed happier than she has in ages, but we came so close to losing her last time. Every time, if I’m honest. I don’t know how much of this desire is just still her grief over losing I think we’ve convinced her to wait and heal a little more.
[There are no personal notes for a while, just treatment notes.]
RE: Dragonhealer's Notebook - L'gan - 20.May.22
25.11.742
Sariel gave me the news after Semath’s Flight. I’ve never seen her so mad as when I suggested a quick between. It’s too soon. Even Cirith knows that, but Bell thinks it will help cheer her up. The gold was devastated when we lost the baby earlier. I tried to convince them we can adopt–that this risked them both–but they wouldn’t listen.
They don’t understand that I’m petrified.
I’ve slept in the infirmary for the past few nights after our argument. Honestly though, maybe I should have just gone to one of the other Weyrs for a while. Visited R’vi or something to blow off some steam. Maybe I’m just being a worry-wherry.
RE: Dragonhealer's Notebook - L'gan - 20.May.22
13.01.742
She’s been sicker with this pregnancy than the others. She swears she’s fine, and Cirith is developing a surprisingly good poker-face even when Semath asks directly. But the nausea has only gotten worse, not better.
15.01.742
We had a scare last night, but everything appears well now. I’ve asked my mother to come up from the Hall again to help with the twins–but also for an outside opinion.
[There are more regular notes again with only occasional short updates about Sariel. ‘Bell is eating more,’ ‘Bell is extremely tired today,’ and the like. It seems he’s treating his mate more like a patient now and the updates are becoming more clinical as the journal moves into Month 2.]
RE: Dragonhealer's Notebook - L'gan - 20.May.22
07.02.742
I can’t do this anymore. It doesn’t help. It doesn’t change anything.
[The page after the entry is ripped out. There are no entries for a few weeks, then it picks up again with more clinical notes than usual, as if he’s seeing more patients than normal.]
RE: Dragonhealer's Notebook - L'gan - 02.Jun.22
14.03.742
The flurry of clinical notes has died down somewhat. There's only so many ways to describe scratches and scrapes and minor injuries, after all.
My friends say throwing myself into my work isn't healthy, and I know they're right. That doesn't make the empty hours any easier to bear, though. It's healthier than drinking, or other forms of self-medication. At least, that's what I tell myself.
Semath skipped her last Flight. I'm worried about her. She and Cirith were so close.